Now I remember why I got out of the family business. It's too damn hard to be an honest car salesman because the vast majority of them are slimeholes still. Audra, John, and I went to a dealer yesterday to look at a blue M-Edition Miata w/hardtop (it's on CL cough-cough).
Showed up and the car looked nice enough. Some scratches on the front bumper on the bottom, center caps had lost their paint, but the telling thing was the passenger window was down an inch and it was raining/drizzling.
I start inspecting the car, and there's an aftermarket front swaybar, Magnecor wires, and the oil is fresh. Looks like somebody cared about the car once. 50% tread Toyo Proxes 4's on actually facing the right direction (you'd be surprised how many times that's wrong...).
Then I realized the left rear 1/4 was a different color than the car. Found the overspray line in the doorjamb. Asked the sales guy about it. He assures us the car's never been hit. I ask him to Carfax the thing. He also mentions right away that they lost the key that morning...
Comes back with the Carfax and it actually shows the accident 4 years ago in North Carolina on the left rear 1/4! Damn I'm good. So we tell him to get a key and we'll be back, and let them know we we're willing to pay $5K cash for the car out the door since it was damaged, dependent on a test drive. Sales guy assures it runs like a top and we won't be disappointed.
We roll back in a few hours later and they have a key. Sales guy says it was $150 but it happens 3-4 times a month normally. Bullhockey. No business will willingly blow $600/month on "lost keys". So John starts the car (he is the one buying after all)...
And immediately there's a valve tick. A loud one. Sales puke says they "all do that". Audra says "no, they don't". I'm proud. I notice the CEL is on and point it out to John loudly. Sales dude disappears. Then a strong smell of burning oil starts wafting out. Pop the hood and the engine is SMOKING!!! Oil is puking out of the head gasket area onto the exhaust. Awesome.
Sales dude then proceeds to plug in an OBDII scanner (it is a 96) and starts clearing the CEL right in front of us! Audra, very loudly, states that the "car is SMOKING" as she nonchalantly reads a book. Other customers glance over and see the column of smoke rising up.
We start walking back to the P71. Sales dude asks where we're going. "Sorry dude, but that car's screwed. It's smoking, leaking oil, the valves are ticking, and the CEL is on. It's not even worth half of what you want with a blown motor". We pack in and head out laughing.
Sigh