Do you think I should buy this???????

Hey I am thinking about buying this beauty, A CLASSIC KICK-ASS Machine known as the 1991 Chysler LeBaron, the grassrootsiest of all motors to go sporting in.

The red demon pictured here will become my new lady pending a few concerns I would like to raise with my online GRM chums first--- because as you all know one just can't make any decision no matter how small or tiny or personal, even remotely relating to cars, without first making a post to draw attention to ourselves, and to seek out the wisdom of complete strangers on the internet. The empty meaningless posts of half enthusiasm our fellow board members provide really means everything in the grand scheme of our major financial decisions after all.

Issue the first:

Which way does the North Pole of the hottie-magnet installed in this particular car face? I would certainly not want the south pole to face forwards, thus making it a hottie-repellent.

Issue the Second:

Is the LeBaron a Miata? I hear that all cars purchased should be Miatas.

Issue the Third:

Bah blah, something about the challenege, blah blah

Chick magnet allignment is adjustable with the aid of a few simple hand tools (10mm boardstretcher and 13mm widget-wobbler)

Purchase with confidence sir!

I heard there was a hottie-magnet TSA; it would only work a W.O.T. over unpaved surfaces.

LOL. Excellent post sir. You've made me forget what the questions even were.

About ten years ago, I bought a 1993 Lebaron convertible with a ripped top for $178. I put a top on it myself and drove the car (hard!) through college and it never let me down.

Was it a chick magnet? No, it was more like a repellant. I was once asked by a date who saw my Lebaron for the firstr time, "Is THAT your car!?" (with a nasty, sarcastic, valley-girl like intonation)

Was it sporting? It had no sporting pretensions as-built, but for so little money, a rental car - like philosophy applied. You know, "The fastest car from point to point is always a rental..." and "The best off-roader in the world is a rental..." and so on. The fastest car on the planet is a $178 car that you cannot kill.

It was a tough little car that never left me stranded. I replaced it with a Porsche 911, that, while much more sporting in nature and far more of a chick magnet, in the real world, for me, is not as fast. Fear of repair costs and high-visibility to cops mean that I don't push the 911 nearly as hard as I did that trusty little Lebaron.

I say buy the Lebaron and (literally) drive the wheels off of it!

If you were to drive strait into the crowd, how fast would you have to go to be sure you kill the gypsies? The ultimate speed of the vehicle may not be enough for the job, irrelevant of the lady-magnet.

PorschesOnTheCheap wrote: I replaced it with a Porsche 911, that, while much more sporting in nature and far more of a chick magnet

I find that the only people that are magnetized by my 911 are 40yr old men and 8yr old boys. The only female who has ever paid attention to it is, unfortunately, married to me and not exactly enamoured of the squished beetle.

Right you are. My wife is the only female who really (pretends to?) like my 911 as well.

The absolute most annoying aspect of owning the 911 is all the dumb/inappropriate questions from random people. I've gotten, at various times, "Nice car! How much did you pay for it?"... "Cool car, what do you do for a living?" and, "Hey! I don't think the gas goes in the front!"

So, because I drive a fully-depreciated car that at one time was some sort of symbol of success, these questions become appropriate? I usually tell people that I couldn't make my VW Beetle fast enough, so I bought the superest of Super Beetles. Other times, I tell them I won it in a raffle.

The Lebaron presented no such challenges. People sort of assumed I lived in it and took pity on me. Nobody started talking to me about the car. Ever. I think my wife (then girlfriend) was pleasantly surpirsed to learn that I didn't live in it!

As for the Chrysler transmission, many have failed, but mine lasted to 180,000 miles. They are still the weak link, though. Valve guides, too - but a little brake fluid in the oil stops the smoke show. Ask me how I know...

3.0 = head gaskets, valve guides
trans = crap if not well maintained with the CORRECT fluid. Listen to the car when it slows down and downshifts. If you hear a whirring noise, then the trans has been rebuilt and has the wrong fluid in it.

2 chrysler trans examples:
1. 1996 Grand Voyager. Bought at 50,100 miles in 00. Replaced transmission 3 times before we sold it at 88,000 miles in 05. 2. 1994 Dodge Caravan. Bought with 125k in 08. Trans was original and worked perfectly until sold. Trans had been serviced every 25k since new. Sadly a perfect trans in a caravan is a rarity. The only reason this van was sold is because it rearended another caravan and I had no place to fix it.

It's a distant relative to the Consulier GTP. 1/4 schroing.

If it is the 2.5L TBI, then it is a decent unit backed by an anemic 3-speed automatic w/overdrive.

Daytona and other K-based car parts can be used to "hop" it up or convert it to turbo/manual, etc. The Chassis was designed to be a convertible from the get-go, so it is relatively stiff compared to other K-based cars of the time (certainly better than a T-top Daytona)

The SOHC 3.0L V6, is from the same motor family as the v6 used in the 3000GT/Stealth and the larger versions used in the Mitsubishi trucks (DOHC, 3.8L anyone?) Also the MIVEC V6 used in the newer Eclipse is also based on the same block.

The 4-speed automatic, like many of the first generations of the fully electronic autos are cantakerous if not maintained properly with the proper fluid and software updates. The V6 was available with a 5-speed, which is essentially the same as the Neon's just with a V6 bellhousing, but they can be pretty rare.

The stock 3L suffers from piss-poor tuning and choked off by the top end. Some judicious work with MegaSquirt and head/exhaust work will fix some of it.

NO. NO. AND NO.

My girlfriend has a 5-speed, 3.0 SOHC with 72K miles and it has more problems than my 116K Saturn and my dad's 85K Civic put together.

EDIT: Because I realized this thread is supposed to be a joke hahaha. I just saw the picture of the LeBaron conv. and panicked hahaha.

Jeez, I thought Vito had decided to go elsewhere since we were all scarfing up Tim's naughty bits. Oh, well: looks like he can best be compared to the moth that beats himself to death on the porch light bulb.

I feel sorry for the bulb, bless it's heart.

You know, "The fastest car from point to point is always a rental..." and "The best off-roader in the world is a rental..." and so on. The fastest car on the planet is a $178 car that you cannot kill.

[giggle] At least SOMEONE understands why I autocross the geo....

This is really the wrong crowd to ask if you should buy any car.

Vito, say this really fast:

I We Todd It

Now, run head first at an excessive rate directly toward something made of bricks.

BTW everyone, do any of you have some Suddardnuts repellant? According to Vito, Im drawn to them and cant resist the urge to suckle like a newborn. And lord knows he knows me best since I wear boots on the dock here in my blue collar workplace. I feel an overwhelimg desire to listen to him.

internetautomart wrote: trans = crap if not well maintained with the CORRECT fluid. Listen to the car when it slows down and downshifts. If you hear a whirring noise, then the trans has been rebuilt and has the wrong fluid in it.

My father's Grand Caravan with the 41TE did that since it was factory new, and many others I have heard also do it.

Duke wrote:

internetautomart wrote: trans = crap if not well maintained with the CORRECT fluid. Listen to the car when it slows down and downshifts. If you hear a whirring noise, then the trans has been rebuilt and has the wrong fluid in it.

My father's Grand Caravan with the 41TE did that since it was factory new, and many others I have heard also do it.

and what year was/is it?

dont worry about he 2.5, the V6 badging ing on it