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wvumtnbkr
wvumtnbkr GRM+ Memberand HalfDork
4/9/13 12:34 p.m.
JThw8 wrote: Once I got really drunk and entered an essay contest to win a Wartburg.....

How did that end?

Ha!

JThw8
JThw8 PowerDork
4/9/13 12:41 p.m.

But seriously, stupid high school hoonage story.

Some friends and I cut school one day to go hang out at an amusement park about an hour away. We were on one of the major highways between MD and VA (danged if I remember which) and it was 4 lanes each way. We were in lane 4 in my 75 Olds with a 455 V8 and there was a brand new (86/87) Mustang GT in lane 2. We were playing a pretty casual game of bumper tag at about 80-90 mph when a Nissan Maxima with 4 kids in it blew between us in lane 3 with the guys in the back hanging out the windows shouting and waving at us.

Mustang guy looks at me, I look at him and we both nailed it. The olds was not much off the line, but once it was rolling it went well. We blew past the Maxima at about 110 and just kept pushing. Well soon enough our exit comes up and off we go with the Mustang right behind us. I thought perhaps this went from fun to fury in our rival's eyes.

He pulled into the parking lot right behind us and jumped out of his car. Big big dude. "Pop the hood" Ok I didn't need a fight, up goes the hood. He looks at my very stock 455 and shakes his head a bit. "How much did you pay for that thing" $400. "Well then why the hell did I pay 20k for a new Mustang that just got spanked by that heap?!" He was actually good natured about it and we had a few laughs. I let him in on the fact that if we'd kept that pace for another 5 minutes I'd probably be shoveling engine internals off the highway.

JoeyM
JoeyM UltimaDork
4/9/13 12:41 p.m.
wvumtnbkr wrote:
JThw8 wrote: Once I got really drunk and entered an essay contest to win a Wartburg.....
How did that end? Ha!

Surprisingly, she didn't disown him even after this paragraph:

To be honest from the moment I saw this car I had impure thoughts about what could be. Not those wholesome family impure thoughts like I had when I met my wife's little sister. No, I'm talking about full blown, bottle of Bacardi, some used 40 weight, a Wartburg and me wearing nothing but a smile, kind of impure thoughts.
JThw8
JThw8 PowerDork
4/9/13 12:41 p.m.
wvumtnbkr wrote:
JThw8 wrote: Once I got really drunk and entered an essay contest to win a Wartburg.....
How did that end? Ha!

It's like herpes, it never ends, it just hides for awhile.

Conquest351
Conquest351 SuperDork
4/9/13 4:20 p.m.

Cruising around in my buddy's 83 Mustang one evening. Prolly around 5:30 when it was just barely starting to get dark. We were talking about cars and he sees the front end of a G-Body pull up on my side. I look over and he downshifts and punches it before I can tell him it's a T-Type. Off we go and here he comes. Sucks us up and blows us out, slows down for us to catch up, floors it again leaving us. "What the hell was that?!" "A T-Type, wait for me to actually be your spotter if you have me in this possition. Haha!"

Another time, we're cruising in the same friend's later 89 GT. Had some work done, pretty quick. I say, "Camaro taillights up ahead, go get him!" Off we go! Catch up, oh E36 M3, it's a DPS. He knows what we were doing and slams on his brakes so we have to pass him. Pulls us over. "What the hell are you boys doing?" "Nothing sir, just cruising." "Well ya'll came up on me at 120, I do have rear mounted radar y'know." "E36 M3..." Cut the crap and take it to a track, OK?" "Yesser." We went right home after that.

Out with my other friend who had a 1999 GT. I wrangle him a race with another buddy's Neon. Neon is GUTTED, header, full open exhaust, ported head, cams, nitrous, friggin FAST. My friend was getting a little big for his britches and I figured he needed some humbling. "Sure I'll race a Neon, I need a win tonight." We're cruising down to the spot and I hear Neon guy purge his nitrous. We get to the spot and my buddy and Neon line up to do their burnouts. Neon does decent one. My buddy goes to do it, ROASTS the clutch. "Hey dude, that's not tire smoke" I tell him. "E36 M3... Guess you need to order me a clutch Monday." He ran anyway, slipping that clutch like it was coated in vasaline as he watches that Neon just haul ass. Great stuff. Still give him hell about that.

Conquest351
Conquest351 SuperDork
4/9/13 4:30 p.m.

Out with my buddy Justin (RIP) who had a Volvo 240. Silver, 4-door, manual, awesome. We went out to a neighborhood development where they had just put the gravel down to make the road base. He's "rallying" it around sliding the car. We're laughing our asses off. He says, "Check this E36 M3 out" and runs it up onto the pile of road base and kinda high centers it. Doesn't stop the car, but you can hear it scraping. We're rollin' laughing. He gets off and back onto level ground and we still hear a scraping sound. Pull over and check under the car, muffler and exhaust is hanging down on the ground. Knocked some rubber hangers off. It's getting dark, we can't find them. Screw it. He drove like that for, like, ever. I can't remember how long. I could hear him coming into my neighborhood chhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh-ch-ch-chhhhhhhhhhhhh "Here comes Spanx". We went to the highschool and he did doughnuts in the parking lot trying to get it to come flying off. It didn't but made a huge spark show. LOL Eventually it fell off and he just ran it sans muffler till he got rid of the car. LOL

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