How can i learn to enjoy something im not that interested in?

I like working on cars. I dont mind the money being spent, and i find the time spent to be enjoyable. Afterwards i enjoy showing off the results. I would love to feel this way about home renovations.  I have some big projects coming up. It needs done, im going to do it, but whenever i work on the house it feels like a chore, a bother. I dont know why i feel this way, is it really so different from working on cars? There is work, there is money spent, there is an improvement made, so why do i enjoy one and not the other? More importantly, is there anything i can do get more "into it"? Any advice is appreciated.

Wrong forum, please move me to Off topics, Mr Moderator. Thanks.

Find a way to personalize it? I know it's got more appeal if I add a personal touch. 

If it is something that has to be done, or is the desire of another member of the household, its just a job.  Do it to the best of your abilities, and take some satisfaction from a well cut miter joint, or a nice mudding job on a new wall. 

As with almost everything, if you take pride in your skill, it will be at least satisfying.

Or, failing all that, you will have the job done and won't have to think about it anymore.

You need some wins.

Men in general, and those who haunt this board in particular, are problem solvers. You got into the car game because it gives you a sense of satisfaction when you complete a project or fix something. You have built on this to the point where you also gained confidence. And a bunch of tool$.

Perhaps what you need is a house project that will challenge your skill-set, provide some degree of utility to you and leave you with more confidence and a sense of well-being. And more tool$

But don't expect it to work if it is just not your thing.

Some people can get this form sports, I have never been able to close that loop. I get the same sense of satisfaction from sports as I would from falling off the roof, so I avoid those two activities.

Pete

In reply to gearheadmb :

I loath home improvement projects beyond basic mechanical repairs(HVAC/plumbing/electric) and completely suck at carpentry - it doesn't matter how many times I measure, I'll have to cut 2 or 3 times, then say "berkeley it, close enough" and end up with a shoddy job. Unfortunately I've also had zero luck ever finding a competent and reliable contractor to do the work. So once something becomes critical enough it needs done, I usually end up doing the bare minimum myself. It's not something I'm happy about, but rather just come to terms with.

Find some inspiration? Examples of nice work? Grab a copy of Fine Homebuilding, or check out their site/videos?

In reply to Pete Gossett :

I resemble your response! +1,000,000 internet points...

Can you swap auto work for home improvement work with someone who's skilled in that area?  I do this on a regular basis with my father-in-law, who doesn't enjoy work outside or in the garage, but does amazing work from a home improvement perspective.

I love working outside, like working in the garage, and dread home improvement projects.  

I think a lot of my disdain comes from my first house. Pete Gossett pretty well summed it up, I didnt know what i was doing, i couldnt afford to have someone else do it, so i went for it. I would struggle through, hate most of it, and not be happy with the results when i was done. Now ive done enough of it that i am confident i can do a good job, i just have a bad attitude about it. I am trying to get my head to a better place about it.

Goodluck. Ive been trying for the last 5 years to get excited about house projects. Id rather work on a sub 500 dollar beater car then work on my house. 

I felt pretty similar to you with my first house. I think some of it is honestly just: keep doing it, you'll get better and enjoy it more. By now I'm halfway decent at stuff. It still takes me forever but the finished job - once I actually finish something - looks good. Something that really helps is to make sure to make progress and not move on to the next project until the first one is done. Sometimes you have to, but other times it's like ADD where you just "feel like" working on something else. Don't force it, but resist that urge. nothing is more demoralizing than half your house looking like a war zone and every room having something that needs done. I lived like that for a few years at the first place and that really taught me some good lessons. Have at least some rooms that are done and nice and you can retreat to when drinking a beer and browsing GRM for a break.

I don't enjoy the process. I loathe shopping for flooring, fixtures, etc. I'm not very learned in home improvements. But after watching many, many youtube videos on various subjects, I became convinced that I could do a better job than paying a contractor. Now that I've finished my first bathroom renovation (it took 9 months!), I'm proud of the result every time I look at it and glad I did it. Even if I didn't enjoy the actual work, I enjoyed the learning process and the outcome. Plus I got to buy a whole bunch of new power tools! Taking my time and not rushing also helped.

Big part of home reno is that in order to be any good at it you need to master a variety of skills at the same time. No room reno is going to be just carpentry or paint.

What drives me is a frustration with contractors. First you need to find one who is not crooked. Then they are not going to show anyway.

By now I have a decent selection of house tools. My favourite is the acetylene torch for doing plumbing. A real plumbers torch transforms your ability to get plumbing jobs done when pipes have had water in them already.

My other motivation for doing house stuff is that it gets me bonus-points from the bride. One fixed leaky pipe on Sunday afternoon will buy me forgiveness for 200 toilet seats left up or 5 weeks or not helping with laundry.

Pete

I don't really like home projects.  We have built a pergola, built patios, retrimmed my garage, painted all the trim on the house, put in new garage doors, and are starting off a basement remodel right now.  I just don't get super excited about it.  I think some of it comes from the ambiguity of the project and the lack of troubleshooting required.

Working on cars is a totally different skill set than working on a house.  With cars, other than body work, and tuning, its an absolute.  Either this part is faulty or it isnt.  Either the bolt is stripped or it comes out.  The parts you remove must go back together a certain way and replacement parts must fit.  With cars, its very easy to do a job 100% correctly the first time.  Something like replace an alternator on xxx model you have never seen or worked on before.  You know where the alternator is, what it does, and generally, what you have to remove to get it out.  You know that when you replace it, your car will return to function.  

With a house, its very much a sandbox and is overwhelming.  There are 100x ways to do something, everyone has a different opinion, and there are generally 3 or 4 totally correct ways to do something.  

I think my fear is paralysis by analysis.  

I'm in the same boat when it comes to doing home improvement.  What it boils down to for me is the lack of knowledge and primarily the lack of proper tools.  I've been collecting a few tools over the past several years, but I can't bring myself to invest in several of the more expensive tools that would make the job easier and the finished product better.  The one thing I paid someone else to do the last time around and will continue to do so, is the trim work.

I hate fixing crap, but like building stuff.

I am more excited to put a bathroom in the basement then fix the noisy wheel bearing our SUV.

Putting shocks and lowering springs on the Miata - excited.  Putting new shocks on the 130,000 mile Acadia - dreading it.

I don't mind the hard work when there is a clear benefit or improvement.  Plus I like to learn the new skills.