Let's hear it. Worst traffic citation.

Let's hear your worst encounter with folks who patrol our roads. Keep in mind self incrimination, statute of limitations, etc. Ah, they don't read this anyway... just don't post any video!

My disclaimer is that I haven't had a traffic stop in more than 30 years (knock on wood) but I wasn't so lucky in the past. My worst stop was years ago on the way to an SCCA Solo event in Reno, NV. I was following behind my partner in my 911E who was towing the race car. I had to stop for a phone call (no cell phones then) and we became separated. I decided to "catch up". We were travelling out in the middle of nowhere on Hwy 395. Empty two lane straight road in the high desert. I let the Porsche off it's leash. I was wailing down the road at 120+ when I past by a one gas station town, population about 8. After that I noticed the flashing lights of an old Dodge patrol car getting smaller in the mirror. I figured that outrunning a patrol car would probably be a bad idea so I stopped and waited for him to catch up and pull over with me. He was a bit excited and said that I must have been going 85 mph! I didn't argue that, even when he added on a write up for no front plate.

Had a highway cop give me 4 tickets on a dirt bike; no lights, no motorcycle license, no insection sticker and improper muffler. The worst part was that my bud and I were sitting on the side of the road with the engines dead, we had just come out of a snotty muddy woods section and were covered head to toe with mud. We were just plain too tired to go any further. He saw us, locked up all 4 tires on the Plymouth Fury (flat spotted the tires for sure) then threw it in reverse and just BOILED the rear tires. We just sat there and watched as he did all this. I went to court over the tickets and asked the judge if he didn't just write the tickets to cover the cost of the tires he destroyed, the cop got all red in the face and the judge started laughing. He knocked the tickets down to like $10 apiece and no points.

Making a left turn in full sideways drift rear tires smoking. Cop crests hill. I just pulled over and waited. Watched him turn around, he asked me why I pulled over I said I was being stupid and he told not to do it again and let me go.

Another time I saw a buddy in a firebird so I blew by him and diddnt let up at least 100mph in town pulled into gasstation was pumping fuel cop passed by and jumped on interstate. My buddy pulled in and said he was looking for me ,apparently he was sitting in an alley. It was at night in all black car.

Passing a coal truck coming into a construction zone down a mountain in my F250 trying to get to a hotel for a railroad job fair....

Ended up getting a 86 in a 55, which also leads into a reckless driving charge on top of it. So there is like 9 points in one ticket and $150 in "court" costs..... Ended up with 6mo probation/diversion, no points, and just the court costs lighter. Good to know people in high places.

Got a Reckless Driving citation once. Driving with some friends downtown late one night when some jackwagon in the next lane started cutting me off repeatedly, I guess trying to start some static. After he made me swerve into the oncoming lane, I slammed on the brakes and made an immediate right just to get the hell away from him.

Unfortunately a city cop was wailing up the right lane behind us, no headlights or flashers, and I made him lock them up as I turned across him. Since he was stopped anyway, he wrote me up, even though he had been about to chase the other guy, and I hadn't really done anything wrong.

I'm still bitter about it 30 years later.

I was in a Food Lion parking lot, in the middle of the night, and there were no other cars in the lot. HUGE lot btw, well lit as well. I was traveling about 2-3 mph across the lot, towards the exit to pull out onto the main road. Took about 2 full minutes to cross.

A cop turns into the lot and lights me up. WTF? No alcohol anywhere, all tags current, no noise issues. He says that he saw me run a stop sign from the road, while traveling 55mph no less. Huh? Where? Apparently, there were lines painted on the lot surface (could not see them they had worn away) and I was traveling in a "lane" and in the middle of the lot there was a cross lane. My lane had STOP painted across it, and I did not. (Gil Grissom couldn't have found evidence of any paint, but apparently "used to be there" is legal in NC)

So I got a ticket for driving solo across an empty lot in the middle of the night. I don't mind doing the time or paying the fine, but at least let me commit a crime!

Interstate 10 outside of New Orleans at 3am, early 1990s, driving a 1992 Mustang 5.0 LX, 65mph over in 70 mph zone (135mph), wreckless operation, noise violation (open headers). NARROWLY avoided jail time, $1000 cash to the corrupt city attorney and the whole thing went away, didn't even hit my record.

In reply to Aeromoto:

Wow!

Nothing too tragic here. Doing 58 mph (it was more like 60+) in a 35 on a windy road and there was a state patrolman sitting over a hill. He was very nice, still had to go to court. I was able to take a driving class (had to skip class to do it) and total is was like $320 and nothing on my record. That was 5 years ago and no tickets since. Knock on wood.

However, there have been a few times I should have gotten ticketed/arrested for back road cruising but my timing is always right and I am coming out of a tight corner driving under the actual speed limit (53 in a 55 but the corner is a 25 sort of thing).

I got pulled over for dong 86+ in a 35mph school zone at 11pm on my way to work. It got knocked down to something inconsequential when I went to court. Hopefully I didn't use up all my luck while I was young, haha.

In reply to Argo1:

I didn't actually get a citation, but I did get a written warning for pulling a wheelie in the Metro-park near my house. I still have that somewhere. If I can find it I'll copy it and post it. It was about 35 years ago, and I was in a friend's car, which was my excuse for doing it in the first place, and likely got me a warning instead of a ticket.

You ready for this?

I had just gotten back from driving a Merkur XR4ti back from Oakland California to Austin Texas. I arrived in Austin about 9:30 pm one evening. Just sat down on the couch and a friend calls me and says "lets meet at the pool hall and shoot some pool". I had my 2nd wind and was down. We ordered a bucked of beers, 6 beers. There were 3 of us. I had 1 beer and half of one. It got to be about 1am and I was about to just go to sleep on the floor. Decided it was time to go home. I leave and pull out on the highway and head home. Get pulled over about 1/4 mile from the pool hall. Officer asks me to get out and do a sobriety test. I pass. They ask me why my eyes are red, I say, "I'm friggin tired man. I just drove from California for the past 2 days and I need to get home and go to sleep!" They arrest me. Know what the charge is? DUI for sleep deprivation. Texas passed a law for truck drivers where they have to have adequate sleep when operating large vehicles. I got a friggin DUI for not having enough rest. I E36 M3 you not! Fought it for about a year and got it reduced, but I still have it on my record and had to go to all the alcohol counseling classes and AA meetings and everything. LOL Cost me a cool $5k worth of fees, lawyer, etc.

At 14 my friend Ron and I dug a 1957 Plymouth out of a tall frozen snow bank because the lady wanted to get rid of it but couldn't afford a tow truck to take it.

Got it running and ran up the road in it, we were just about to duck into the woods (field car) when the local PD spotted us.

No registration, no license, no insurance blah, blah blah, $1500 fine and a year in jail.

Mom's gonna be PISSED!

Luckily she wasn't home when they called, but Ron's mother was. She came up and beat the crap outta him in the back of the cop car.

Cop let us go.

I was never so scared in my life, Mom still doesn't know.

I was driving home late on night and there were two state troopers out on the side of the highway investigating an accident. I was a bit blinded by the strobes and flipped on my high beams to avoid hitting any debris in the road. One of the cops just thought I was being an a-hole and immediately chased me down and pulled me over. After listening to my explanation, he gave me a ticket for having a radar detector on my windshield (obstructed vision).

In reply to Conquest351:

Not a big fan of Tex-ass troopers. Just this last week I was driving through from California with my wife following. They pull my wife over for following (me) too close. I pull over too. They get pissed at me. They decide my wife's eyes are red and search (both) cars for drugs. Unpacking them both. An hour, three squad cars, and five officers later they let us go with "warnings" (For WHAT?!). Can't stand those guys.

1981(ish?) Chevy Citation, white and rust. Iron Duke. Front bench seat held up mainly by the fuel lines since the floor was long gone. Never drove it, only a passenger in it.

That was the worst.

Got pinched for a 145 in a 70 and the trooper ended up chatting with me for a half hour about how I liked my glock.....then told me to quit being stupid. Same cop ticketed me a week later for 71 in a 55......and that was my 4th defferment in 3 years....

Many years ago I narrowly avoided what could have been an ugly ticket. On one of the parkways around here, middle of the afternoon, clear sunny day, no traffic, I had a sudden urge to discover what the top speed of my old E28 was in third gear. This became a problem when I popped over a crest to see a NYS trooper sitting on the verge about an eighth of a mile ahead. Knowing I was popped, I simply slowed and pulled over in front of his car; all he had to do was flip on the lights and get out. He got me at 86 in a 55 (I was coasting down) and advised me that this would be 8 points, lots of fines, yadda yadda yadda, but that he appreciated me not making him chase me 10 miles down the road, so he wrote me for failure to yield to a traffic control device (the speed limit sign) - $50, 2 points.

OK, I have two.

About a week after my 18th b-day, I was chillin' on a friends couch one Saturday night watching Headbanger's Ball . These 3-girls who were several years younger knocked on the window & wanted us to help them get beer. We weren't interested and told them to go away. They came back later - after Headbanger's Ball was over, and also after the local establishments had closed - and we figured "why not?" Since neither of us were of-age, we packed all-5 of us into my Country Squire wagon, found someone older(who was already drunk) packed him into the car too, and headed down the road to the next town that still had stores open.

As we're heading into town, we pass by some cops searching around an apartment building with flashlights, and there's a paddy-wagon in the turn lane facing us. This drunk dumbass rolls down the window and yells "berkeley you you berkeleying pigs!"...and of course the paddy wagon whips a u-turn and promptly pulls us over. They toss the girls into the paddy wagon and make us follow them to the Public Safety Building a few blocks away. They call the girls' parents to pick them up, since they were under-age, give the drunk guy a ticket for public nuisance or some such, and I got a ticket for not having my license on me. They held us in the pen until about 4am, and then the 3 of us went out for breakfast. As far as I know, my parents never knew.

The second time was after I'd finished college and was packing to head back home. Had the same friend with me(who was a big-time pot smoker & probably had a stash on him), and we were in the Country Squire heading up Highway 52 northeast of Lebanon, IN when a state trooper pulls us over. Turns out there was a gas station robbery using a car like mine & someone had been shot & killed! After some intense questioning, we were finally let go. But damn I sure was scared!!!

Duke wrote: .....I'm still bitter about it 30 years later.

I had an oblivious old lady drift into my lane, going 15 under the speed limit, and no turn signal. Literally right in front of me. I changed lanes rather quickly to avoid a collision. I even managed to use my turn signal (good habit) Officer only sees me change lanes quickly and how close my car was to hers, pulls me over and I got a ticket for "following too closely" He was also claiming I did not signal. Did not see anything the old lady did because my full size van blocked his view completely so he didnt believe me.

Its dropped off my record years ago but I am still pissed about it.

I have one that I actually deserved...

Was in my 1993 525i and was going to work early one morning. 6am, Parmer Lane, Austin Texas, unbelievably there was no traffic. I decided I was going to haul some ass. Came to a hill and downshifted to 4th and coasted, had one of those bad feelings... Crest the hill and 2 cops pass me, I get that sphincter clinch going and there's another one in the turn lane. I blow past him and slow myself down. I pull over and wait for him in an empty parking lot. 2 cars screetch to a hault behind me and 4 cops bail out and surround the car. They order me to get out. I do. They hold me up against the car and start screaming at me about doing 104 in a 60. One cop is laying into me and the others are looking in my car, around it, etc. One of them says, "he's got bald tires!" The cop yelling at me asks if I'm running slicks and what the hell do I think I'm doing. I told him they're not bald, they just don't have much tread on them, they were made that way. They were the old Kuhmo's that barely had tread on them. Then he starts telling me I'm being a smartass, blah blah. Then they tell me my license is suspended and they're going to have fun "berkeleying me over on this one". I got arrested and charged with wreckless driving (got it dropped because there was no traffic), public endangerment (again dropped for no traffic and proof of tire condition), speeding (dropped because the cop didn't show up to the trial), and driving while license suspended ($500 fine). Still cost me like $2k because of the lawyer... Fun. I don't miss Austin that much. LOL

My favorite is one I DIDN'T get. Running up I95 in NC. Running hard playing with a 450SL, me in a sweet 240Z, Chevy power. Running around 120, I'm on the right, he's in the center, just having fun. Come over a hill and headlights come on in the median. Trooper hauled ass after the Merc, ignored me.

When I was about 14 I lived in eastern Washington where I had a couple 3-wheelers. Well it was about a mile and a half to the trails from where we lived (all up hill and down) so we had some pushing to do. One weekend I was coming back from a good day of riding and there was this looooooooooooong down hill road that I didn't use much but since I was tired I figured I could use gravity to give me a bit of rest.

After about a quarter of the way down the hill I get tired of holding my bike back against gravity so I sat side saddle on the left side (where the shifter is) and just let gravity pull me and the bike down to the bottom. I figure that sitting side saddle, if anyone saw me, people would not think I was trying to "ride" the 3-wheeler on public roads...

Sounds great but super-cop pulls around a corner at the bottom of the hill just as I get there and then SWERVES right in front of me (into oncoming traffic from his point of view). I reached across and grabbed the handle bar brake (it operated the rear brake as there were no front brakes on the bike) and swerved to the right almost tipping it to avoid him. Sitting on the left side of a right turning three wheeler has the tendency to give one great lessons in momentum.

My favorite question of the interrogation was "Well if you weren't riding it (implying that it was in gear and running) then why did you panic?"

Because you whipped out in front of me berkeley-tard!

Ended up getting off without any citation, but I'm still a bit bitter.

This one is on my all time stupidest things life list, but I tell it as part of my own penance. It was Memorial day and I was on the way home from work in the turbo-d NX after working 16 hour days all week and not sleeping. I had been pulled over about 5 times prior in the course of a month for various things lights being "too dim" or going 2mph over the speed limit. I am in a pack of cars on a two way road going the same speed as traffic. I spot an oncoming cop coming pass going the other direction, then see the cop do a U turn without hitting his lights. At that point I knew he was coming after me, I dropped a gear and passed a string of 3-4 cars on the wrong side of the road. The cop hit his lights and the chase was on, in a panic I turned down long windy road with tight curves.

What I didn't know is that there were cops out all over due to it being a drinking holiday. Another cop joined in the chase that was right by before I got anywhere on the road I just turned onto. I got to the end of the road again with the cops close by. And sure enough there were two more at the end of the road I was on pulled across the intersection lights on. Strangely they left just enough space for me to get around in the dirt. I took the opportunity slowed way down and drove through the space. After that I gave up all fear of crashing and getting myself killed, the only fear I had left was of the police. I took the car up around 110 driving down a 45mph road and turned off on to another road as I didn't see the lights in my rear view mirror anymore. I went into the back of a church parking lot and got out and hid in the woods for a what seemed like an eternity. Until a phone call I got with my mother, "what are the police doing outside?!"

They told her I could turn myself in and they would go easy on me. They had pictures of me from when I went between the two stopped cars with the strange space. My poor mother came and took me to the police station after my attempt to get her to take me to Canada didn't work out. I ended up knowing one of the cops that had been chasing me. He bent over backwards to keep me from getting the felony "Eluding and Evading" and kept me out of jail. Instead I got a bunch of traffic tickets, fines, a DUI class, and community service.

@Jere - shoot! It's easy to forget that life isn't like Need for Speed. If you evade the cops long enough they don't just say "oh well" and go back to the station.

All these stories make my experiences seem lame. The worst I got popped for was 55 in a 35, and to this day I swear it was a 50mph zone. I was past a 50mph limit sign by the time the cop pulled me over but he said it was 35 until the sign. Oh well, I was young and driving a fancy car so he felt the need to ticket me. I wasn't self confident enough at that point to fight the ticket. And nowadays it is a 45mph zone even where he claimed it was 35. Sheesh.

the best I should have gotten.. I was going down to DC on a sunday morning. I was on the washington parkway (I think) in my Ti with a MB and a Porche ahead.. we blew by a cop at 100mph and he didn't even blink.

The one that I got and didn't deserve was two days before christmas. I was in bumper to bumper traffic in Point Pleasant NJ, heading for the parkway. At the light I am turning right to get out of town and traffic is just inching along.

The two cars ahead of me slip into what I thought was the turning lane, so I follow. Light turns green and we make the light and there is a cop on the side of the road that waved the three of us and the car behind me into the 7-11.

Seems I had turned into the turning lane a car length early and got a 4 point ticket for passing on the Right and a 6 pointer for Reckless (for passing on the shoulder) that would have been the end of my license as I already had 2 points and that would have been 12. (suspension limit in NJ)

A lawyer cost me 500 and got it all knocked down to "failure to obey the directions of an officer"