As I was rushing to the airport early this morning to catch a flight to San Francisco, I went past a sign–blinking and brightly lit–that angrily advised me to slow down. Everyone has seen these signs, and normally I just ignore them and keep rushing to wherever I’m late to be.
But this time, I couldn’t get those blinking yellow …
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I hear you Tim. I hit 73 a few days ago, and am rethinking the 50-60 hour weeks. I fear the problem is that we love the creative process the work provides.
I know you are not one to go to a cars and coffee and sit on a lawn chair behind your car answering the same question over and over. (note taken from your podcast)
In my case I only escape if I am traveling out-of-town. If i'm home i go into the same work-work routine. Problem is It really doesn't feel like work.
I'll follow your journey of discovery.
OBTW, it looked like the kids handled the Challenge pretty good this year, a first step maybe.
Take care of yourself. Margie deserves time with you too.
A couple of clichés that are totally relevant:
We're not getting any younger. Edit: I'm 67, and running myself hard too.
No one's obituary says that he wished he spent more time at the office.
docwyte
PowerDork
11/7/22 9:36 a.m.
I have no desire to work 50-60 hours now. I can't wait to retire, nobody tells me how much vacation I can/can't take but my opportunity costs are so high to take it, I hardly ever do. I want to get away for longer periods of time, can't do that now. I'm gonna punch outta here as quickly as possible...
kb58
UltraDork
11/7/22 11:09 a.m.
I used to work in Field Support, where on rotation, we took one-week 7/24 on-call duty. My coworker was driving in to address an issue in the middle of the night and got a speeding ticket. He said that it made him question his priorities in life.
I retired 11 months ago, taking the company's early retirement offer to their "old growth" employees. Things I've noticed since retiring:
- Gaining 1.5 hours every day not sitting in traffic
- Commuting was much more stressful than I realized, which only became evident once it stopped.
- I can now concentrate on projects with fewer (work) interruptions.
- Doing a home remodel entirely by myself is a great use of time, and saves a lot of money.
Car-related, I sold Midlana for a number of reasons, but one was that I've never considered myself a really good driver. I came to the realization that being in my 60's, I probably wasn't going to get faster, and was slightly afraid of the monster I'd created, as it was definitely faster than I was.
Floating Doc (Forum Supporter) said:
No one's obituary says that he wished he spent more time at the office.
Huge life lesson right there.
GregAmy
New Reader
11/7/22 12:40 p.m.
The most important skill I've developed in recent years is...the ability to say "No". "No mas, por favor" goes a long way to setting my personal priorities.
Sometimes I don't say it enough. Maybe sometimes I say it too often. But there are many situations in life that will continue along its merry way without my intervention/input. I can't - and shouldn't even try to - do everything.
Trust me, it gets easier after the first couple times.
GA
What is this "slow down" concept your speak of? I do not wish to know more. I do not wish to subscribe to the newsletter..
Traveling and spending time with others at their things has to be a priority. Sometimes my stuff sits a while longer, but going on trips or to family events is always more important. It's tough to admit but sometimes I have to remind myself family is more important than my hobbies or job. Putting that into practice can be even harder.
Plan trips with family, and take them. It's is as rewarding as finishing or showing off a project but it is far more inclusive of others.
We are going to a swim meet this weekend. My stuff can sit another weekend. It's not going anywhere.
31rx7
New Reader
11/7/22 2:16 p.m.
Age 64 here, and thinking about the next 20 or 30 years.
This is a time where many of us have the option to spend our time how we want with less or even no consideration for generating income. If we are blessed, we have our health, reasonable financial security, and stability in other areas of life.
At the same time, there is recognition that this train ride is not going to last forever, that our time to do the things we love and value is limited.
So, how do we make best use of it? The answer varies for all of us, but I have found the following:
- Think hard about what you value and treasure. Think about the things you've maybe taken for granted or assumed that, if lost, would be hard to accept. Family, friends, mental and physical health.
- Diverse hobbies / activities / interests is of benefit. We all have this addictive hobby and eventually, our ability to enjoy it will decline. There needs to be things to fill that void.
- Diverse social circle is similarly of benefit.
- Feed all elements of yourself. Stay physically healthy, mentally open and engaged, spiritually (no matter what you believe or don't).
- Stay engaged with the world at large, maybe through part time work, through volunteering, etc.
- Make plans. Have things to look forward to.
- Appreciate today and focus on the good.
Enough of my philosophical wanderings. All the best.
kaybat
New Reader
11/7/22 2:55 p.m.
About the same age, yoga(and less coffee) helped me slow down a couple of notches.
Look in the mirror.............you're doing this to you. You need to set boundaries for yourself and stick to them........period.
1. You have a full plate: no new events (pretty sure Margie has told you this already).
2. Stop with overly ambitious deadlines.
3. If it isn't a core element of the business or dramatically improve it then why are you doing it?
4. Do the toughest thing for an entrepreneur, delegate. If you don't slow down you'll end up in the hospital. What good are you to the team in the hospital?
5. Again, you have a great team and you don't need to do everything yourself.
Margie is a saint...........for God's sake take her on a vacation; the Elva and barn will keep.
I'm 60 my solution is riding my vintage BMX bikes with my son a couple of days a week as well as going for joy rides with my wife.
I had to learn this slow down bit the hard way. After being diagnosed with colon cancer in 2003, and after surgery and chemo, my doc told us that stress is a killer, stay away. I did return to work, but after a couple years the stress thing started to rear its ugly head once again. After an in-your-face confrontation with my then boss, and after having a "think drink" with my wife, we determined it was time to retire........so I did, the very next morning. I highly recommend it. I'm still a survivor at age 76, and still going pretty strong.........slowing down is the best way to go fast when you want to.
Tim Suddard said:
She wants to travel some, play in the garden and enjoy the vintage travel trailer we restored together. I may have to just say no to some other stuff to make more of that happen.
Is it time for me to pay more attention to the blinking yellow signs and slow down?
Yep, that's pretty much it. You should listen to that Tim Suddard guy. He seems to know what's going on, even if you don't listen to him...
Just had my 60th birthday, so a lot of thinking about how to spend my time.
The silver lining of Covid has forced me to work at home....and now I've found I like it. Its rekindled home life at just the time the wife and I became empty nesters.
My work used to involve travel a few times a month to some amazing places. I'm very fortunate to have is a great job that I truly enjoy that lets me be creative and effective from home. I've always said if I didn't need money I'd do something similar to my current work. I've finally shifted from career scrambling up the ladder and fighting for projects to enjoying the projects I have. This has finally given me time and flexibility to create that tiny garage I've always wanted and spending weekday track days being coached by drivers I admire. I know I'm not going to be faster than the other guy, but I'm improving MY lap times.
I know there'll be a day when I'm asked to not work on projects and simply watch at the track. I'm doing my best to appreciate what I have now.
759NRNG
PowerDork
11/7/22 7:25 p.m.
31rx7 said:
Age 64 here, and thinking about the next 20 or 30 years.
This is a time where many of us have the option to spend our time how we want with less or even no consideration for generating income. If we are blessed, we have our health, reasonable financial security, and stability in other areas of life.
At the same time, there is recognition that this train ride is not going to last forever, that our time to do the things we love and value is limited.
So, how do we make best use of it? The answer varies for all of us, but I have found the following:
- Think hard about what you value and treasure. Think about the things you've maybe taken for granted or assumed that, if lost, would be hard to accept. Family, friends, mental and physical health.
- Diverse hobbies / activities / interests is of benefit. We all have this addictive hobby and eventually, our ability to enjoy it will decline. There needs to be things to fill that void.
- Diverse social circle is similarly of benefit.
- Feed all elements of yourself. Stay physically healthy, mentally open and engaged, spiritually (no matter what you believe or don't).
- Stay engaged with the world at large, maybe through part time work, through volunteering, etc.
- Make plans. Have things to look forward to.
- Appreciate today and focus on the good.
Enough of my philosophical wanderings. All the best.
out of the park Bro....I'm 69 and a Fist Bump ......thank you
Lots of great comments here.
I think the biggest thing is you have to actively pursue that work life balance and be adamant about keeping it.
15 years ago I left an industry that was particularly bad about boundaries and haven't regretted a single day. Ironically I now make more than I ever would have in that industry.
Great article - I just hit 60 and am looking towards retiring but not yet. There is peer pressure with friends - hey, when you retiring?
65? The health insurance plan is still a challenge.
j_tso
HalfDork
11/7/22 11:04 p.m.
Even if it's something you love, piling on too much may turn it into something you hate doing.
Never lift till you see Jesus.
OJR
New Reader
11/8/22 12:37 a.m.
I can't imagine life without racing at 72.
In reply to kb58 : its more fun to drive a lower horsepower car than what you might think, even if you want or think you deserve a higher horsepower car. That's partly the reason I have an normally aspirated car for track events and a turbocharged car for street use. It seems backwards but the wrx gets respect from me and will live longer and keep me alive longer as a street car. The legacy wagon track car is slow in a straight line which is a good thing. It gives me time to think in between corners and its as secure on track as anything you can ask for. Is it a challenge to drive quickly? Of course it is but at least it isn't terrifying. Btw I turn 70 next month and am busier now than i was when I retired at 62. Good luck slowing down guys!
In reply to kb58 : its more fun to drive a lower horsepower car than what you might think, even if you want or think you deserve a higher horsepower car. That's partly the reason I have an normally aspirated car for track events and a turbocharged car for street use. It seems backwards but the wrx gets respect from me and will live longer and keep me alive longer as a street car. The legacy wagon track car is slow in a straight line which is a good thing. It gives me time to think in between corners and its as secure on track as anything you can ask for. Is it a challenge to drive quickly? Of course it is but at least it isn't terrifying. Btw I turn 70 next month and am busier now than i was when I retired at 62. Good luck slowing down guys!
I thought this would be about threshold braking. Dissapoint.
Since this is starting to come off the rails already I've arrived to point out that Amy Macdonald does the opposite of slow me down.
Also while I fought it tooth and nail being medically forced to pump the brakes in my late twenties has massively improved my life do it while you can ideally before you have to.