Dear diary - apparently I crashed

Just checking in to see how you are doing Foxtrapper.

EastCoastMojo wrote: Just checking in to see how you are doing Foxtrapper.

Thanks for asking.

Overall, better and better. But, as they keep telling me, recovery is going to take several years, and it's only been 4 months now.

Physically, I'm fine. I look as pretty now as before the crash.

Mentally... I've got a mild speech impediment, damaged vision, poor stationary balance, and reduced cognitive abilities.

I'm functional, but limited a bit. For example, it was astonishingly difficult for me to pass the brownie making test in occupational therapy. Who knew following a box recipe could be so darn hard! LOL. We've all agreed I shouldn't do things like home wiring repairs either. At least not for the foreseeable future.

I'm still not back at work, and come next Thursday, I'll largely know if the next step is hiring an attorney and filing suit. I'm hoping I don't have to do this, but right now, it seems I'm the only person still with this hope.

Will I ride a motorcycle again? Well, I did buy that new Nolan helmet for a reason. Come spring time I plan to try and find out. I think I'll find riding the big Harley on the street to be easier than dirt biking on trails. But, I won't know until I try them.

P.S. I have great hopes for some special eyeglasses I'll be getting shortly. I finally went and saw an Ophthalmologist who specializes in TBI patients. She was able to work astonishing magic with lenses and color filters. She could all but take complete control of the ringing in my ears, my balance, and the clarity of my thinking with the different lenses and filters. And, she knew it, and knew what she was doing.

Thanks for the update. Keep getting better!

Good to hear man. Sadly we don't bounce back as fast as we get older.

Good to hear.

If you need somebody to keep the Spitfire and/or Miata exercised, you know where to find me.

That's remarkable about the ophthalmologist! Glad to hear of the improvements...

When you're ready, we can go riding.

I think I'll let you lead though.

Sounds like you got a few large wacks to the head not just one. Just take your time and heal up. I'll sugest that it is worth taking the MSF road course BEFORE you try riding on the street again.

Best wishes

foxtrapper wrote: I finally went and saw an Ophthalmologist who specializes in TBI patients. She was able to work astonishing magic with lenses and color filters. She could all but take complete control of the ringing in my ears, my balance, and the clarity of my thinking with the different lenses and filters. And, she knew it, and knew what she was doing.

This is amazing to me....like magic

Hot dang man, I'm coming in really late. I've just read the thread in its entirety and just wanted to say you sound amazingly better and I'm pullin for ya.

Thanks. Sincerely.

I'm back at work, finally. While I still want to drown the folk from HR, my own bosses are great. I mean teary eyed great. I couldn't ask for better, and honestly don't deserve what I've been given.

I've had my magic glasses for about 3 weeks now. The actual glasses aren't as magical as I'd hoped, but they most definitely help. Relearning how to see has been...uncomfortable at times, to put it mildly. But it's pretty easy now. People do say I look good in them. They say I look smarter, more like an engineer. I think that's a compliment.

Maybe I should say more about these TBI glasses. They have a special "TBI blue" tinting and prismatically correct the way my brain has twisted my right eyes vision. The blue tinting really calms the world down. Without it, the world tends to squirm and things jump out at me. Imagine a really cheezy 3D horror movie if you will. The more blue spectrum lighting, the worse the effect. With these blue tinted lenses, things calm down and stay still. The effect is instantaneous. If I look over them at say a blue lit stage, things squirm and pulse and move. Look back through the lens and they snap into place and stay still. The prismatic adjustment for the twisted right eye perception I cannot see per se, but I can feel it. The closest to seeing it was the trapezoidal shape of square objects for a while when I'd put the glasses on. The retraining of my brain has been downright unpleasant and painful at times, but I'm through most of it now. Squares are squares, unless I'm tired. I think it's altered my uncorrected vision as well. If I'm not wearing the glasses, things seem somehow different. Not better or worse, or wrong and right, just different.

Passed my driving evaluation with flying colors. But sending the report into the MVA has put them into mild hysterics. Lots more papers, and more evaluations and reports. Hopefully it will all settle down in the end with no weird driving restrictions or loss of licence.

Going for some special brain thinking testing next week. They say it will reveal a great deal. Not only what thinking areas or processes are damaged and how, but should also be able to tell us what is MS damage and what is TBI damage. OK.

Episodes still come. Maybe they always will. My son will gleefully run and get my cane when he sees I'm having troubles. But it's rare I actually need it, and it's usually only for a hour or two at most.

So in a nut shell. The world still occasionally flips and does weird things that can knock me off my feet. Sometimes I get all thick and muddle headed and need to go to a dark and quiet place for a while. Thoughts can jam up. I can get stuck when talking. I'm likely to not remember the last step of a list of instructions, or the last bit of what you just told me. But hey, I'm a whole lot better than I was, and am still improving.

I am so glad to hear you are doing better and finally back at work, and the glasses do sound miraculous!

Wow, so glad you didn't need to resort to attournies to get back to work.

Keep getting better

Sounds like reality is readjusting to you. Keep on keeping on!

foxtrapper wrote: Without it, the world tends to squirm and things jump out at me. Imagine a really cheezy 3D horror movie if you will. If I look over them at say a blue lit stage, things squirm and pulse and move.

OMG, I would be searching for a high bridge to leap from. I get bad vertigo and headaches when my eyes act up. I feel for you on everything you are going through, but this one would be my personal hell. Good luck and I hope that one day all this will be behind you.

Fox- great to hear about the glasses. Keep at it, and life will eventually return to fully normal (whatever that is :P)

I am so glad your bosses are understanding and that things are improving. I wish you continued good luck, man.

Adrian_Thompson wrote: Wow, so glad you didn't need to resort to attournies to get back to work. Keep getting better

This!

Glad to hear you're back at work.

Has there been any estimation on how long your vision might be the way it is now?

Cool! A step a time Fox. It's great to hear about progress.

Jack

Oh I like this rehab neuropsychologist. Did some all day testing of my brain a few weeks back. Went over the results with her yesterday. No great earth shattering revelations; I'm in darn good shape, with some damage. As she/we put it, good thing I already got my engineering degree, I'd be hard pressed to get through it again today.

Anyhow, she thinks I should ride again! As in actively encourages it. Still should wait the full six months, and start with caution, but go out and enjoy it.

She said essentially I'm a bit of an adrenaline junky, and the release I get from riding is a big part of why I ride. Without it, and living "safe" all these months, it's no wonder I'm going a bit nuts and am a bit cranky and difficult to live with. I need the release. Cool lady! She also agrees with my wife (and myself) that I should get back into AA. Been many years now. I'm still clean and sober. But, ah, could use some involvement in my life from folk like me.

She doesn't expect to see me again, but let me know she's there. If I need any help dealing with the frustration of being a bit limited now, and the emotional stuff that does indeed come with brain trauma, she knows some good people I could work with.

I still can't say enough good both about Hershey with the care they gave me right after the crash, and Sinai here in Baltimore with the rehabilitation. They've been amazing with helping folk like me.

FOX, glad to hear things are on the mend. Followed this thread from the start, was a bit worried early on but it seems as though you cant be stopped haha.

Sobers me up to the seriousness of riding. However, on two wheels ill remain. What your brain lady said about the riding helping you is probably where I am at too haha.

Hope things continue on the path to recovery.

Be safe. Have fun

Glad to hear it Foxtrapper, I know you can't wait to be back on a bike! One step at a time, you will be riding again before you know it.

44Dwarf wrote: I'll sugest that it is worth taking the MSF road course BEFORE you try riding on ANYTHING.

Glad you're better. Take your time healing, you only get one shot at this.

Take care of yourself,

Dan

Fox,

The guys at the Triumph Experience just saw this thread. We've been wondering where you've been.
Everybody wishes you well and hopes you feel better soon.

Chuckle. Yea, I'm all better.

I just got lost at work!

Not badly, I was able to figure out how to get back to my desk and start over. Just made me late for a meeting.