A thread about homeschooling

In reply to SVreX (Forum Supporter) :

Thank you. Swmbo won't give up the good things. Plus other issues....

Other than Kindergarten, my actual first day of pubic class was College. I was home schooled from 1st grade through high school. I went into college without a problem.

That said, my social skills were off-the-rails bad because of this upbringing. I blame my parents for this, so, whatever. I'm fine now, thanks to the most wonderful women in the world, my wife.

Home schooling is dependent on the parents. Learning stuff is not hard. Being a well balanced person can be. It's up to the parents. Home schooling works as for education. Life is the sum of everything. Don't neglect the other stuff.

In reply to Shadeux (Forum Supporter) :

I went to public school my entire K-12 education, and my social skills throughout school, during college, hell probably even up to now are hot burning garbage. I agree with SVreX's opinion I've seen in other threads, that socialization in school is largely BS. 
You may have still been socially awkward in public school, you just would've had the fun opportunity to be tormented by your peers. 

mtn (Forum Supporter) said:

Just FYI, so you know where I'm coming from with all these questions- and our daughter is 4 months old, so this is all just for the back of my mind right now

• I came from one of the best districts, probably in the country, but definitely the State (Illinois).
• My parents had me in supplemental Math tutoring from 1st grade through 5th grade - not because I was struggling, but because both of my parents struggled with math and they didn't want the same for me.
• My older brother went to the Catholic high school because of social issues with his class in middle school, and the fact that the Catholic school catered better to his strengths; I went to the public school.
• I was a really, really E36 M3ty student. In middle school, I got straight A's because I was able to finish the homework on the bus. In High School, I graduated with 14 college credits, a 32 on my ACT, and a 2.6 GPA (♩♩ One of these things is not like the others ♩♩). I wasn't good at fitting into the boxes they wanted me to fit into. I hated homework, so I didn't do it. Didn't need to study much because I was perceptive and read a TON on my own, but that will only help you with tests. 
• In college, I was an alright student in a very difficult program (Actuarial to start, then Mathematics with sides of Business and Economics). 
• I have a lot of family that we now have to call "Doctor" who graduated from prestigious universities, who came out of exceptionally poor high school programs

 

 Ok, on to more questions:

• What percentage of your time did you dedicate to your employment, to your children's education (not a math lesson in the pizza, but the actual "classroom" time) , and to the rest of "life"

I had my own business through most of our homeschooling.  I put in my obligatory 50+ hours at work.  I did very little classroom teaching.  Almost zero.  That wasn't my role.  I DID assist with big picture guidance, selecting curricula, engaging in the non-classroom ways.

• What about for your wife?

My wife was an at-home educator.  80% of her time to teaching, 20% to running the house.

• For the classroom time, was it 50/50 you and your wife doing the teaching? Or 33/33/33, you/her/both? Ballpark it, if it is possible

Answered above.

• Did you or your wife have a background in education at all?

No.  My wife was a music therapy major, and I was an art major.  Most of the people we know with education backgrounds didn't find it helpful.  A lot of what they are taught is classroom management- not useful.  They learn methods for teaching large groups- not useful.  They learn the bureaucratic processes- not useful.  

• What was the hardest subject to teach/for your kids to learn?

Each kid was different.  Kind of like people.  Topics we knew we were weak on we sought out assistance.

• Is there anything that you're not confident in your knowledge of that you were still able to teach?

Most things.   

I think you are getting stuck on an idea called "banking".  It identifies the teacher as the "holder" of some form of knowledge, and they "bank" that knowledge into an empty kid (like making a deposit in a bank).  The problem with this approach is that it limits the educational potential.  The student can never learn more than the Master.

We didn't want to teach our kids subjects.  We wanted to teach them how to learn.  They are now capable of learning ANY subject on their own, and continue to do so.  My son, for example, is a high end videographer.  He works for Disney, ESPN, etc.  He has earned an Emmy for his work.  But we never taught him ANYTHING about film, cameras, or the industry.  He is 100% self-taught.  He never went to film school. He didn't learn the subject from us, he learned how to learn, then sought out the info he needed and taught himself.

• What about something that you thought that you knew, that it turns out you didn't?

You mean like how to teach our kids?  Yep.  

Our kids watched us admit we didn't know, then watched us learn.  They do the same.

• What "rules" did you have for your kids?

Irrelevant.  What are YOUR family's values?  What do YOU want for your kids?  How do YOU want them to treat other people?  What character traits are important to YOU?

These are the things you get to decide.  Or, you can let the public school decide.

• How did you grade? And where I'm going with this is, how did the GPA work for your kids getting into college?

My wife's answer- High School is awesome!  She has a 10 day course she offers on this subject.  

I will add that we developed a real transcript, which met acceptable standards, and it communicated well with schools.  Colleges LOVE homeschoolers, and actively pursue them.  They know that they will get dedicated alumni who will continue to be community leaders- its good for the schools.  They go out of their way to find us.

• • Corollary to that, what colleges did your kids go to?

3 of them spent 2 years dual enrolled at a 2 year school called Darton College.  1 did the same at Albany State University.  My daughter graduated from Berry College, then got her graduate degree from Georgia Tech.  My eldest son went to Valdosta State.  My next son went to Shorter University.  My youngest son is at Kennesaw State.

• How did you decide to start homeschooling? Or why? Did you start in public schools for kiddo #1 at all, or was your youngest in the good school district the first time?

Eldest 2 kids started in public and private schools, but only for less than a year.  We had friends who homeschooled and encouraged us.  My wife pushed for it.  I was totally against it.  The more I studied, the more open I was to it.  Kiddo #5 is our first to attend public high school.  This would have continued, but COVID has forced the schools to do things they suck at, and we don't need them to try to teach us how to homeschool.  She will be back to homeschooling this Fall.

• If I'm  biased about anything, it is that our math curriculum in this country is atrocious. I think kids should be learning calculus by middle school at the latest (controversial, sure). What did your math curriculum look like, generally?

Not as good as yours will.  You will be an awesome resource to an entire homeschooling community on the subject of math.  I wish we had someone like you.

We used packaged curricula and online classes- including online teachers in older years.  My kids did not learn calculus by middle school, however they all found themselves well ahead of their public schooled peers in mathematics when they started college.

In reply to mtn (Forum Supporter) :

BTW, your description of your upbringing sounds really similar to mine.  I was a E36 M3ty student too..

Ranger50 said:

In reply to SVreX (Forum Supporter) :

Thank you. Swmbo won't give up the good things. Plus other issues....

Kids ARE the good things.

I respect the struggle.

We homeschool.  Lack of socialization is a fake thing made up by people to scare them from homeschooling.  Kinda like home school kids were historically ripped on tv shows.  I'm not sheltering my kids from anything, and they can get a way more diverse education from us than they can at schools, plus they're free to explore more of the things that greatly interest them.  They don't get to learn how to machine things or weld or build cars or turn wood on a lathe at a school.  Yeah, there are some days i wish a bus picked them up at 8 and dropped them off at 4, but most days i'm happy they're here with me. 
 

We made up our own course of study that's very open to letting them pick what they like to do and supplement it with adventure academy, hooked on phonics, and adaptedmind.com

Neither of my kids is weird and they play and converse just fine with anyone. 

Good thread.  Just posting here to 'subscribe' so I can follow along.  I might learn a few things and maybe be able to supplement my son's schooling.  But unless someone invents cloning really fast, there is very little chance my son will be homeschooled.

I've got two daughters, 12 and 10.  The younger is showing signs of emotional distress due to a family issue involving her mother.  Her older sister thinks she's on the road to either an eating disorder or possible self-harm in the future.   I'm trying to get 50/50 custody of the kids (currently 70/30 in favor of the ex).   The girls are "seeing" a counselor occasionally but I have grave doubts it's doing them much good.   Homeschooling has definitely been on my mind as I have a M.Ed in Instructional Design but I have a feeling that neither I nor public school will have the resources necessary to address my concerns. 

In reply to stroker :

You might be surprised. 
 

The homeschooling community is a strong, safe group of people who really care. It might be an environment that helps them a lot. 
 

But I will admit that homeschooling as a single parent is really challenging. It would be harder with a disagreeable ex. If she were to complain about child abuse to family services, it would be hard to convince a judge you were doing a good job homeschooling if they were home alone.  It's risky.

Yes, some people consider homeschooling child abuse.  Or truancy.

I'm sorry you are in this position.

In reply to stroker :

Your situation is really a need for counseling first. Homeschooling won't fix it. 
 

You should probably be seeing a family counselor weekly until things improve. 
 

Yours is a situation I would NOT recommend homeschooling. You've got other problems to deal with. The potential of putting your custody rights at risk is real.
 

Im sorry I can't help more. 

Subbing to easily find this again, later. Thanks for sharing, all, and great questions.

We've been homeschooling for a decade now. Responding to questions listed further up that were not directed at me:

There are several parents who try to do homeschool but end of doing schooling at home. As stated by SVreX, homeschool is meant to be advantageous to each student individually. My four girls all have different interests, one is studying advanced literature and the other is interested in the Science History curriculum we picked up. We're not shoving all 4 down the same path. Much like public school around here, there is a core curriculum they all get, but they get to diversify when they want to. We just have more ready options and freedoms than the school system. The one doing science history also got distracted by a 9 month foray into survivalism after reading Hatchet.

My kids are only slightly socially inept, but with me as a parent, that is expected.

I don't know of a single type of child who shouldn't be homeschooled. I know of several types of parents who shouldn't be homeschooling.

One of the things we've been watching is the outcry from local parents at the 90 minutes it takes their kids to do all their schoolwork for the day. Many teachers will tell you that they spend the other 5+ hours a day just doing crowd control.

While I won't decry the public school system, I won't champion it either. If you want an interesting take on what schools are for, I'd suggest Brady Haran and CGP Grey doing Hello Internet #9

Finally, when the boxes get dropped off by the UPS guy, we have to fight them off so we can verify that everything we ordered arrived. And at the end of that day, we have to take the books and material away and have them save it for when we're ready for school. One of or 13 year olds was disappointed because she was 2 days from finishing her pre-algrebra math and didn't have her algebra material yet. Were you ever that excited about school? Are your kids?

The socialization thing is a concern but it has less to do with the actual homeschooling and more to do with the person. There are plenty of socially awkward people that went to public school.

There is a stigma with homeschool though, a lot of people view it as something odd religious groups do to indoctrinate kids

Im glad I was homeschooled from 8th grade on. I was bored and my local schools were crap. In the 90s we still had textbooks with 48 states, and the high school lost accreditation for a few years.

I was almost kicked out of school for reading a book, Starship Troopers by Heinlein btw, I was in 7th grade and was told that " it was something I should be allowed to read" . In standardized tests I was way above my class but I was a c student at this school. We had a bad winter and the school bus wouldn't come within 5 miles of my house to pick us up because of the sheer amounts of snow. The teachers wouldn't work with us on lesson plans and  2 of my teachers tried to fail me and wouldn't let me make it up.

After that.....my mom taught me. She was a teacher's aide for years. Meeting up with my old classmates shows me that I got a better education

In reply to Johnboyjjb :

Well put!

In reply to SVreX (Forum Supporter) :

Grammar it's my problem since a childhood, so sorry for mistakes

In reply to Huan :

I was just playing with you. 

Antihero (Forum Supporter) said:

Im glad I was homeschooled from 8th grade on. I was bored and my local schools were crap. In the 90s we still had textbooks with 48 states, and the high school lost accreditation for a few years.

Where in the backwoods was this? In the 90s you had textbooks from the 50s? I'm surprised a textbook would even last that long.

Even in Oklahoma where, "Screw the school let's give the money as subsidies to gas and oil companies" it isn't anywhere near that bad. 

z31maniac said:

Antihero (Forum Supporter) said:

Im glad I was homeschooled from 8th grade on. I was bored and my local schools were crap. In the 90s we still had textbooks with 48 states, and the high school lost accreditation for a few years.

Where in the backwoods was this? In the 90s you had textbooks from the 50s? I'm surprised a textbook would even last that long.

Even in Oklahoma where, "Screw the school let's give the money as subsidies to gas and oil companies" it isn't anywhere near that bad. 

North Idaho.

It was shocking, but basically the junior high got zero funding for anything ever.

My two homeschoolers graduated this year, my daughter at just under 16 years old, my son at 17. My youngest prefers public school. He's autistic, I think the regimented day really sooths him.  
I was totally against home schooling. Then I started teaching in public school. The amount of time wasted, the red tape, the parents, the bureaucracy, the list goes on. 
Thanks for offering up your help as many are not forced into it for a while.