When I was a young Medic Platoon Leader in an Infantry Brigade, I got a bunch of new medics, straight from AIT right before we deployed to the Iraq for the mop-up of The Surge. Among them was a young man who was incredibly bright and full of life. He was an excellent Soldier, medic,and friend. He served well and bravely in Iraq.
He just returned from Afghanistan, still serving in the same Infantry unit. Last Friday, he attended the Battalion Ball with his fellow Soldiers (I am out of the unit now, but many of my once young medics are now running the old platoon with many of the same Infantrymen around them), went out for drinks with those same men afterward, then went home with his wife. He told her he was going out for a walk. He walked to the end of the street and took his own life with his pistol.
No one knew anything was wrong, he didn't leave a note or give any indication that he had plans to do what he did. He was obviously battling some deep, invisible wounds. For whatever reason, he chose not to seek help. There is nothing I can personally do now to bring him back -- I did my best to keep him alive as his PL in Iraq, and thought my job (in that respect) was over when we got home. Now what I can do is say that if you ever think it's over, it isn't. It takes a real man to ask for help when things aren't right, no one has all of the answers on their own. Don't let a good life go to waste.
Thanks for your indulgence, this has been a trying couple of days for me.
" We few, we happy few, we band of brothers. For he today that sheds his blood with me shall be my brother... And gentlemen...now abed shall think themselves accursed they were not here, and hold their manhoods cheap whilst any speaks that fought with us."
I came in to counter the subject with something funny... but damn.
I am very sorry for your loss.
I can't wrap my mind around the thought processes that lead up to suicide. I had an uncle that committed suicide when I was 15. I was angry at him for a long time for leaving my cousins without a father.
I'm sorry for your loss as well. My thoughts and prayers are with you and his family.
Jerry
Dork
10/1/13 5:40 p.m.
Definitely sorry for your loss. SWMBO had a good friend that committed suicide, no warning no symptoms. Just one day, decided to go. I couldn't imagine.
Toyman01 wrote:
I can't wrap my mind around the thought processes that lead up to suicide.
Me neither. You know everyone always says, "he had so much to live for", and in this case, it's absolutely true. Just wishing that someone could have picked up on a sign or something...
And thank you all for your condolences.
Joey,
I am so sorry to hear this news. Suicide is a very tough situation to deal with, and I wish both you and his family all the best. Godspeed.
That is so sad. I can't imagine the pain you or especially his family are feeling. My thoughts are with you.
As Javelin said, "Godspeed"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C3yqXeLJ0Kg
Depression is a disease of the mind. You could be standing there with all of the loved ones in your life telling you that they love you, and it wouldn't matter.
People in this world are broken for many reasons, some of which there is no cure (only damage mitigation) for. Sometimes there is simply nothing that can be done. Other times, nobody realizes a person needs help until it is too late. I've saw people who can out act the best actors/actresses, put on a show, seem like the life of the party, and at the end of the day, they go home and deal with crushing sadness.
As somebody who almost did it, I understand. All the love in the world would not have helped your friend. He needed professional help, and with the mindset in both the Military and in Civilian regarding "professional help" there was no way he was going to go get it.
People get broken for any number of reasons. Some people can stand up to the worst depravity imaginable and come through with only the occasional nightmares, some people witness a gory car accident and go around the bend. There is no X = Y in psychology.
You may not have been able to save this man, but you (and his buddies) can save his family. Demons are deeply personal, do not let them eat up what he left behind
