Girlfriend Walking at Night Safety Discussion

I'm hoping to get a discussion started about different methods people (particularly women) use to stay safe when walking at night. I live on a college campus which is pretty safe and I myself have never felt threatened here. However I do worry about my girlfriend walking around campus at night when it is deserted.

The campus has a couple of "rape poles" which are poles located in random places with a button to summon authorities immediately. I think the purpose behind these is good but the chances of being near one when required is very slim.

I bought her a pepper spray but she never seems to carry it (I'm always on her case about this) and am wondering what else she could carry to possibly thwart an attack. She complains that the pepper spray is too annoying to carry and she is also afraid of some one playing with it and accidentally spaying it. She refuses to consider carrying a gun ever since she read some statistic about how 99 women are overpowered and shot with their own gun for ever 1 that kills her attacker...

I am wondering if carrying a small but very bright LED flashlight to illuminate her path and possibly point in the direction of an approaching stranger would be a good idea? People say to stay in well lit areas so would making your own lighting be a way to deter a confrontation? Or would this act as a "here I am walking all alone" type beacon?

What do your wives, girlfriends and friends do to stay safe while walking? Any stories you would like to share on the matter?

Joshua

Oh, the reason I was thinking of a flashlight is that she could use a small one attached to her keys (so it's always with her). This is the one I had in mind:

Self-defense class.

Walk like a bad ass. Always works for me.

If she won't carry mace then maybe she isn't as concerned about it as you?

Go running with her. I call bs on the gun statistic you listed, but I'm too lazy to look it up.

I used to carry an 8" telescoping baton in my car back in the day, was perfect for beating someone in the face for self defense.

I would not use a flashlight.. it ruins your night vision.

I think do do make pepper spray that fits on a keyring though?

I am just not sure how to approach this.. she needs to be aware of everything 100% of the time.. the problem is.. on a college campus, most rapes are done by people the victem knew.. if it was somebody she knew from class, she might not have her "radar" up until it was too late

Joshua wrote: She refuses to consider carrying a gun ever since she read some statistic about how 99 women are overpowered and shot with their own gun for ever 1 that kills her attacker...

This is bull.

Learning how to be aware and how to run a pistol properly is the closest you are going to get to 'safe' when by yourself.

Anything else is half-assing it.

Any self defense training or ideals is useless without her being taught situational awareness.

Get educated, get prepared, get taught, get a gun.

Similar situation here. My girlfriend actually carries the mace though, it is even in a little cute pink case.

A few things that she/we use/did.
-Don't walk/run alone after dark.
-Take a self defense class; specifically one that is tailored to women. My girlfriend took one, and wouldn't show me a lot (they don't let any men know how/what), but I did figure out that it would be extremely difficult to overpower her with the techniques they taught.
-Don't walk/run alone after dark.
-Rape whistle.
-Don't walk/run alone after dark.

mtn wrote: -Don't walk/run alone after dark.

I think this is a big thing. While unfortunate to do so, sometimes limiting your exposure to situations is the best way to avoid problems.

So you guys think that his girlfriend who thinks it is too dangerous to carry mace is willing to carry a gun?

Situational awareness is the best defense. Self defense instruction would be next.

My wife goes out with pepperspray and/or our black lab if she's running alone.

Just because she isn't as concerned about as you, doesn't mean you shouldn't be concerned. That's our job.

I think the best solution is to always go out with someone. Even if it's two girls, the attacker is unlikely to be able to control both, will recognize that fact, and look for an easier target.

mtn wrote: Similar situation here. My girlfriend actually carries the mace though, it is even in a little cute pink case. A few things that she/we use/did. -Don't walk/run alone after dark. -Take a self defense class; specifically one that is tailored to women. My girlfriend took one, and wouldn't show me a lot (they don't let any men know how/what), but I did figure out that it would be extremely difficult to overpower her with the techniques they taught. -Don't walk/run alone after dark. -Rape whistle. -Don't walk/run alone after dark.

Not just situational awareness - control the situation/circumstances as much as possible. E36 M3 happens on campus more than your girlfriend thinks (esp big campuses) and is often a crime of opportunity for someone who is in the wrong place/wrong time. Universities are also pretty good at keeping it quiet since it's bad PR.

Beyond self-defense class - Hopkido. Mrs. Oldtin knows how to break a lot of bones in a hurry. She's also a pretty decent shot.

Tazer gloves.

I keyring is a great thing to use for self-defense. Keys across the face can be a real deterrent. There are also lots of great things to add to a keyring as well. Carrying them "at the ready" is also a deterrent to the casual attacker.

Self-defense class. For whatever reason, the same words that come from a cop or other expert will carry more weight than when you say it. For years, I have preached practicing scenarios with my wife such as what gun would you grab if there was someone in the house and her (wrong to me) answer was a certain .38 chiefs special. When she went to a class, they preached using a shotgun which was always my answer. Unless you are gut shooting someone, you might as well throw the chiefs special at an intruder considering your chances of hitting the perp at a reasonable distance. There are now two barely legal shotguns in the house.

fastmiata wrote: Self-defense class. For whatever reason, the same words that come from a cop or other expert will carry more weight than when you say it. For years, I have preached practicing scenarios with my wife such as what gun would you grab if there was someone in the house and her (wrong to me) answer was a certain .38 chiefs special. When she went to a class, they preached using a shotgun which was always my answer. Unless you are gut shooting someone, you might as well throw the chiefs special at an intruder considering your chances of hitting the perp at a reasonable distance. There are now two barely legal shotguns in the house.

So, what's the spread on your "legal" shotguns? Something tells me that it's not very much.

A small spread from a shotgun is gonna be a whole lot bigger than a 38.

What in god's name are all your wives/girlfriends doing out of the kitchen at night?

pinchvalve wrote:

Know what those cat things are really for? Defending the interior of her purse from a husband who is looking for car keys to the family car.

Situation awareness. Pay attention to what is around, who is around, etc.

Situation control. Avoid a dark parking lot, detour when you see someone lurking, etc.

Run. Run like the wind. Run immediately. When you see someone step out don't pause to consider the situation or to ask if they need help. Run. Run long, run hard, run far.

Scream. If you're caught, scream Scream "help" It carries well and people respond to it. Not always, but many times.

Fight. A woman in particular will likely lose the fight, but she might escape by simply being a noisy pain to deal with.

Poop. If the clothes are being torn off, the smell and sight and feel of poop tend to turn many people off, including assaulters and rapists. By no means universally, but a tool, use it.

Pick a defense mechanism and learn to use it automatically, muscle memory .

My GF sometimes worries about going to the dog park at night. I sometimes worry about what her doberman and her german shepard would do to anybody who messes with her at the dog park at night.

At my daughters campus, they have volunteers on call that walk girls home if needed. They did the same at Miami (Ohio) University.

First rule for my daughter was/is "common sense".

In our case the SO very rarely goes out after dark without me or someone else. She is very security conscience and getting to be a good shot with a revolver, she still won't touch my shot gun though. I am working on it but unfortunately she finds it as intimidating as the intruder would.