Habits/Routine to battle Depression?

mtn (Forum Supporter) said:

z31maniac said:

For me it meant putting down the booze

 

I think that my idea of what moderation actually is got out of hand. 2-4 drinks a month is ok. 2-4 a week is probably not. 2-4 a night, like what I was at? Yeah, that is a problem there. While I haven't cut it out completely, I'm allowing myself to drink only from December 23-31, and January 15-17. That is the Holidays and my birthday. Then I'm not allowing myself to drink again until March 1. November was similar, I had alcohol only during Thanksgiving. Most of January and all of February are dry. I actually gave away a couple bottles of Rye. Feeling pretty good about that. I'll get another 12 pack of beer for Christmastime and my birthday, and that'll be it until March. I'm thinking about taking it out entirely, and will evaluate at that point.

When I do drink now, it is a treat, I drink a whole lot less due to my low tolerance, which leads to less hangovers. And it is worthless calories, which if you're trying to lose weight, is the worst. 

Yeah. That's another thing, drinking + girlfriend always wanting to make nice meals means I've gained a ton of weight the last 3 years and 3 months we've lived together, so I have to get that under control as well. Already down about 6 pounds in the last 3 weeks, but I have A LOT more to go.

Unfortunately, my now diagnosed severe clinical depression means I was self-medicating with booze at levels that would have made making it to 50 very unlikely (I'm 38 now), if I would have even made it that long. 

"Exercise" seems to be the #1 suggestion. I don't get it. When my Doctor asks about exercise level I ask if he is familiar with imaginary numbers.

I myself have never experienced the magic elixir benefits of exercise. Seriously, I skipped 4 straight years of gym in HS because I thought it was a waste of time. I hate team sports, so that did not help.

The idea of running around the block for fun is just weird; I want to, and can get,  paid for that level of exertion. If I ride a bike, its because I want to go somewhere, I don't feel  better than if I drove.

And yet I have friends who find off road marathon running to be addicting to the point where they can not stop even when injured.

I must be doing it wrong.

I build vintage bicycles in my basement. I learned that with my spine problems I can't work in the unheated garage in the winter and I need a project too keep my mind clear. My issue is more anxiety then depression but things got dark for me after the first back surgery and I learned this trick as I recovered. Even if it's only 15 minutes a day it means I did something.

this is the same reason I work a part time job. Doctors keep pushing me to file for disability but I learned when I was home recovering that I can't handle being home with nothing to do. I need a reason to get up and get going. 

I waffle back and forth on whether I like Jim Carrey anymore, seems he went off the deep end.  However, this quote of his, while kind of trite, seems to be on the right track

For me, with COVID precautions regulating life, breaking the routine of being housebound seems to help the most.  Mask up and go grocery shopping.  Mask up and glove up and wander a flea market.  Even just loading the dogs into the truck and going for an hour drive helps.

What helped the most was visiting family the other weekend though.  First time in a long while that I've had a belly laugh.

I do think I need to talk to the doc and reevaluate my dosages though

Communicate, listen and express yourself

Be of service to others

Do something to set yourself at ease, whether it be exercise or create. Something that's a release without expectation. 

Do something to make yourself feel accomplished, even if a small minor accomplishment that will be a hill or hurdle that you need to take on tomorrow. 

I think for me I'm better when I have a bit of a routine, like making sure all of the dishes are done once a day and making sure I don't sleep in too late / getting a decent amount of sleep every night (or at least the opportunity, once in a while I wake up at 4 something and don't really get back to sleep like I would want to).

I removed alcohol entirely this year from mid-March until Thanksgiving Day last week and the day after I was just kind of blah'd out.  Went back to zero alcohol again and will do my best to keep that going.  

A couple of years ago I discovered Hashing which is sometimes described as "a drinking club with a running problem" and that's been pretty good.  Here's a link to a description if this sounds remotely interesting; What is Hashing? and I could describe further if you'd like.  It's not for everyone but it might be another avenue to explore.  Your call.

With covid and now cold weather things are harder and speaking for myself, I think it's bad to sit around too much, but hard to get up and do be active.  There's a lot of good advice in this thread that I will be thinking about for my own self.

If you find yourself feeling down every year in the winter, you might want to read up on Seasonal Affective Disorder.  (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seasonal_affective_disorder).  It's thought to relate to the lack of sunlight, affects many people, and in some cases can be helped by light therapy (basically spending an hour or so a day sitting under a particular sort of lamp while doing other things).

codrus (Forum Supporter) said:

If you find yourself feeling down every year in the winter, you might want to read up on Seasonal Affective Disorder.  (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seasonal_affective_disorder).  It's thought to relate to the lack of sunlight, affects many people, and in some cases can be helped by light therapy (basically spending an hour or so a day sitting under a particular sort of lamp while doing other things).

 

Vitamin D can help with that. Also everyone should be taking it as a Covid precaution. 

Deciding to look forward to things really helps for me. Plan a trip. Even if we can't TAKE the trip right now, you can decide a place, research the time of year it's nice there, look up restaurants, hotels, make an itinerary. It can take a lot of time and then you can start saving a little at a time to keep looking forward to that plan.

We've talked about this offline(ish), but what works for me is forcing myself to meet with friends and family. Get out of the house and do things. You know, all the E36 M3 we cant do. So I'm back on the meds and seeing a therapist (virtually for crying out berkeleying loud) twice a month. The things that help me we're not allowed to do and if you do them are chastised as being a grandma killer and hater of mankind etc etc. So basically, berkeley your mental health. No one cares about you. (that doesn't really help)

Honestly at this point I'm expecting suicides to start increasing faster than the fake vid death rate. 

Thanks again guys. I probably need to exercise more. For most of the past year my "exercise" has been track riding motorcycles 2-4 days a week. Now that's it's cold (and rainy lately) that's dropping off and it's probably not good for me. We also don't get the new race schedule until at least the end of January, I have more races to look forward to, but I don't know when, and that sucks. 

I think missing my normal summer is really starting to weigh on me now. I made it through then, but that has messed with my normal rythm and makes the year seem impossibly long. 

You can try exercise, but it doesn't work for me.  I detest it, it makes my joints and muscles incredibly painful, destroys my achy feet, makes me tired, and seems to offer me zero of that "exercise high" that people talk about.  Overall, it makes me more depressed.

I realize that it is great advice for some, but I only mention this because I feel you should have the option. Choose for yourself.  I think it works for the majority of people, but I also think there are some who won't be helped by it.

And the suport you guys are showing makes me thing of Fall Back Down by Racid. Love you guys. 

I know that "ferd" is out in the yard .......the airstream is kinda indoors.......doesn't the Pcar need some attention? Are there any projects I've missed?   Or......wait for it..... interested in helping me do head gaskets on the DuraMaxx?

It's sad to hear that depression is so prevalent in so many lives but it's also comforting to know your not the only one trying to make it through one more day!

mazdeuce - Seth said:

Thanks again guys. I probably need to exercise more. For most of the past year my "exercise" has been track riding motorcycles 2-4 days a week. Now that's it's cold (and rainy lately) that's dropping off and it's probably not good for me. We also don't get the new race schedule until at least the end of January, I have more races to look forward to, but I don't know when, and that sucks. 

I think missing my normal summer is really starting to weigh on me now. I made it through then, but that has messed with my normal rythm and makes the year seem impossibly long. 

I didn't put racing on my list and I really should have.  I try to be on a race track at speed in something at least once a month.  Idealy it's racing but coaching, testing or just a track day or time attack work.  I've failed miserably at that this year, what with my local track being closed for most of the year and travel restrictions beign in place but that's the goal and it really helps.  My shrink endorses that plan which is nice since it essentially gives me a perscription for a race car.

I think we all deal with it to one degree or another.   I absolutely have seasonal affective disorder which combined with stress due to work issues or life in general can amplify it.  (Probably shouldn’t live in the NE where it’s cold and dark right?) I’ll be echoing others but keeping a routine, having a set group of tasks to accomplish regardless of how trivial they may seem and getting outdoors as much as possible help me a lot.  Acknowledging that you have an issue is always a big part of improving things.  

Sometimes even simple things like taking a less direct route back to the shop after a job visit to enjoy a nice day for a couple of extra minutes can make all the difference.  Make sure to reward yourself occasionally.  

In reply to Curtis73 (Forum Supporter) :

The big thing exercise does for me is gives me the satisfaction of moving towards a better me.  I was 262 when i started and am losing weight, in turn that will be less weight to carry around on my sore knees and back, which should lead to increased quality of life.  

Learn to juggle.   Start with 2. Then 3.  Then 5.   This will take over a year.  

2 days for 2.

Another 2 or 3 days for 3.

Then the rest of the time to get to 5.     

I feel better knowing I'm getting a divorce.

NOHOME said:

"Exercise" seems to be the #1 suggestion. I don't get it. When my Doctor asks about exercise level I ask if he is familiar with imaginary numbers.

I myself have never experienced the magic elixir benefits of exercise. Seriously, I skipped 4 straight years of gym in HS because I thought it was a waste of time. I hate team sports, so that did not help.

The idea of running around the block for fun is just weird; I want to, and can get,  paid for that level of exertion. If I ride a bike, its because I want to go somewhere, I don't feel  better than if I drove.

 

And yet I have friends who find off road marathon running to be addicting to the point where they can not stop even when injured.

I must be doing it wrong.

To clarify, I never said it was fun.  I said it works for getting my motivation and optimism up :).  I don't enjoy running, I don't get "runner's high", but it works to keep the weight off, and I feel less crappy about everything when I can burn off my stress and anxiety.  The less crappy feeling isn't immediately after the exercise, it's a general improvement over 2-3 weeks of sustained effort, similar to diet changes or getting enough sleep.  I am not a marathon runner, I huff and puff like a locomotive, and my limit is about 3 miles.  Also:

"The idea of running around the block for fun is just weird; I want to, and can get,  paid for that level of exertion."  Two thoughts:

1.) Care to share the job offers where you're getting paid to run through a park?  I am interested.

2.) But you're not, are you? :P

Patrick (Forum Supporter) said:

In reply to Curtis73 (Forum Supporter) :

The big thing exercise does for me is gives me the satisfaction of moving towards a better me.  I was 262 when i started and am losing weight, in turn that will be less weight to carry around on my sore knees and back, which should lead to increased quality of life.  

No argument here.  I lost 50 lbs and looked good, but it wasn't worth the trade-off for me.

Bottom line... in my case, there is something going on that the doctors haven't figured out yet, but it has to do with joint and muscle pain that makes exercise a very painful (and depressing) thing.

My point was to basically say that I wonder if some people respond chemically in a different way to exercise.  Some people can take a jog or lift weights and they get the physical release of happy hormones.  It doesn't seem to work for my chemistry.

Appleseed said:

Depression kills interest in things you like.  

This^^^^^^  10 million%.  It's killing me.  To help I wash the E36 M3 out of the dishes.  I keep the trash cans emptied and bags hauled off to the dump.  I have been trying to get one bay of our garage cleaned out so I can get my wife's convertible inside.  It's been parked outside for 10 years since my wife retired and brought all the E36 M3 the other teachers didn't want. It needs a new top because of this to the tune of $1600.   I cannot make any headway because she brings more E36 M3 than I can get rid of or stored.  If we come out of this pandemic married I will be amazed.  My daughter is doing a bathroom reno for my wife, who has done nothing but bitch about it.  She hasn't had to turn a hand other than to order couple of things online.  I may need to move this to the rant thread.  

A couple of things that help me:

One is a level of habit that could probably be called ritual around a couple of the simple things that my wife and I like, and like extra in the Winter:

1. Coffee; we look forward to it from the evening before. That's been true for years, and it helps. Of course, preparing coffee can be fussy, and while I'm WAY short of the roast-your-own-beans folks, I do fuss with it a bit, and it adds to the sense of occasion.
2. Storytime. My wife and I take turns reading to each other at night. Usually light stuff, and we've actually drifted more toward me reading and sticking to stuff we're re-reading because she tends to sleep more (so it doesn't matter if she's asleep for half a chapter), and I tend to want to stay up reading about cars or bikes after she's conked out.

Other than that, lots of folks have mentioned exercise, and I'm really happy with a few related discoveries in the last few years. Some may be useful, some may be adaptable, some... may not be either. This is all 100% cycling-centric, but I think there are similar tools for running, and I wonder whether some other sports are getting that way with modern tech:

• I got inspired by cycling again due to a combo of a vibrant and silly local cyclocross scene, and I think  even more importantly, the Joe Parkin book, A Dog In A Hat.
• While I like real riding in the real world, there's a lot of efficiency to be gained by stationary trainers because you don't have to ride or drive to where you can really ride, you don't have to dress for January, and you don't have to worry about whether the road you're on matches what you should be trying to do workout-wise.
• The Sufferfest does a fantastic job of gamifying stationary cycling. Instead of grinding your will to live into a fine paste in the abrasive media of discomfort and boredom, it gives you constantly varying targets, a storyline, humor that at least stands up when you're half-nuked from effort, and a lot of workout in a compact time. They also have a lot of workouts that have the constantly varying targets and structure, but no video/storyline/etc so for steadier workouts, I'll choose one of those and catch up on the SCCA runoffs or something. The application has a widget that will give you the info you need as an overlay so you can watch stuff and still see what's going on.
• They've got training plans, which is fantastic because I don't have to decide what I'm doing; I just look at what's on for the day. I'm not a pro (understatement of the decade), so if it doesn't happen, I try to just shrug it off and pick up the next day. Winter is hard enough without beating yourself up for not getting your workout in.
• ONE OF THE BIG UNEXPECTED BONUSES of the thing is the yoga stuff that's optional in the training plans. I'm not... a yoga person, really, but I haven't found such a concise set of stretches and strengthening in another format, and again this is just on the plan. The unexpected awesome part was that while I opted in mostly to keep cycling from tying up my lower back like it sometimes does, a whole bunch of aches, pains, and general feelings of being 48 just sort of tapered off after including the yoga for a while. I just realized one day I wasn't doing my achy morning hobble across the lawn. (It gives me particular hope that I can get functional on a tiny motorcycle when I was already pretty uncomfortable on a full size sportbike 3-4 years ago)

Okay, enough of the Sufferfest infomercial. It's just been so helpful for me I tend to want to share it about where I think it might be of interest. I don't have one of the super-nifty "smart" trainers that can alter the resistance automatically, but I did need to find a Craigslist rear wheel with a power meter hub to fit my bike. You can technically do it without that, but that's really where the targets are; it'd be pretty iffy without it. Given that I already had a bike (anybody reading who'd be interested probably does already?), the stuff I added for my very workable setup was:

• A Cycleops fluid resistance trainer ($30 on Craigslist) (Any rear-wheel stand type trainer will do)
• A rear wheel with Powertap hub ($250 on Craigslist)
• An ANT+ USB dongle so it could talk to my laptop ($42 on Amazon)
• Not necessary, but nice: A heart rate monitor strap like a Garmin or a Kickr Tickr (~$50)

You know many (or most?) of the MotoGP folks are avid cyclists, so you've got that psychological aspect of prep for next season, too

Curtis73 (Forum Supporter) said:

Patrick (Forum Supporter) said:

In reply to Curtis73 (Forum Supporter) :

The big thing exercise does for me is gives me the satisfaction of moving towards a better me.  I was 262 when i started and am losing weight, in turn that will be less weight to carry around on my sore knees and back, which should lead to increased quality of life.  

No argument here.  I lost 50 lbs and looked good, but it wasn't worth the trade-off for me.

Bottom line... in my case, there is something going on that the doctors haven't figured out yet, but it has to do with joint and muscle pain that makes exercise a very painful (and depressing) thing.

My point was to basically say that I wonder if some people respond chemically in a different way to exercise.  Some people can take a jog or lift weights and they get the physical release of happy hormones.  It doesn't seem to work for my chemistry.

That's exactly the case. It's why there are literally hundreds of drug for depression to help augment your brain chemistry.