If a girl and a guy think they are going to get married but the girl doesn't have a ring and they are not planning a wedding, do you think they should consider themselves engaged?
EDIT: I supposed to add it doesn't have to be an expensive ring. I am sure how that effects this.
If the guy asked her to marry him and she said yes I would consider it engaged.
There are Victorian formalities involved. I've had guys introduce the recepticle du joir as his "fiance" only because they have a kid together, been cohabitating for yearsand drive each other's cars.
You've done everything but trhe ceremony, go to the courthouse.
IMHO no. No ring, no date, no engagement.
But I'm old....
914Driver wrote: IMHO no. No ring, no date, no engagement.
I agree. Calling off an engagement that doesn't involve a date or a ring is no different than breaking up w/ a girlfriend.
That ring has a ton of significance (and money) attached to it.
No ring and she's not even planning a wedding???
That's a 12 pack and a few Tequila shots away from being a one night stand.
Um, NO
JFX001 wrote: No ring and she's not even planning a wedding??? That's a 12 pack and a few Tequila shots away from being a one night stand.
I hope you planned for the slew of keyboards you were going to have to buy .... + my nose hurts like hell from the coffee that came through it...
Ok. This girl thought me and my girlfriend were crazy for thinking that you had to do all this to be engaged.
Datsun1500 wrote: Many people "thought" they were going to get married until someone else better came along.
+1 
I can't imagine planning a wedding if I wasn't engaged.
And don't buy into the 3 months salary crap on a ring. I spent just over $1k (still more than I would have liked) but she picked it out and that's what she wanted.
EvanB wrote: If the guy asked her to marry him and she said yes I would consider it engaged.
Definitely.
The ring is BS
z31maniac wrote: And don't buy into the 3 months salary crap on a ring. I spent just over $1k (still more than I would have liked) but she picked it out and that's what she wanted.
Spent about that much on hers. Made my own in the garage. 
Does your state have common law? My bride of 19 years and I were leagally common law spouses before we were maried. Georgia was common law after 6 monts cohabitating or just representing your self as a spouse for any legal matter. She told the power company she was my wife to get the electricity transfered to our new apartment then we shacked up together for over a year befor seeing the judge.
I say that no ring or date yet is still engaged IF you agree that you are exclusive to one another and intend to get hitched. I bet she has been planning her wedding since she was a little girl and watched Cinderella.
I remember the briefing we got before being stationed in Idaho, something about common law marriage only taking 24 hours there so don't let your buddy stay out past noon on Sat....
It depends. A couple that just vaguely have been thinking they might get married someday aren't engaged. A couple that's talked things over and decided they are getting married for certain, just haven't figured out any details of the wedding, maybe. But the more I looked at it, the more there's something kind of missing from the question - if you're planning to have a wedding, you're planning a wedding. It may not even be agreeing on the date, but you've got to have a real commitment to be having a wedding to be engaged. It's the commitment that makes the engagement.
My fiance picked out her ring on eBay... lucky for me it was $34
z31maniac wrote: I can't imagine planning a wedding if I wasn't engaged. And don't buy into the 3 months salary crap on a ring. I spent just over $1k (still more than I would have liked) but she picked it out and that's what she wanted.
Funny how 2-months salary morphed into 3 in recent years.
I spent $4500--and that was on the low end of what others around me spent. (...and I'm far from a high-roller--even then when I had my pre-marriage/mortgage disposable income)
They have some real purdy rings down at the drug store in those little vending machines. Ya know, if you want to make it official.
No ring, no date, no engagement.
+1. For those in the "Well if he asked and she said yes..." crowd:
I don't care how cool your girlfriend is, how little she cares about material things like clothes and jewelry, how uninterested she is in the "big" wedding; she wants that berkeleyin ring. And if you give two E36 M3s what her family and friends think about you, (which you REALLY should, IMHO,) you want that berkeleyin ring too.
A ring is significant....the price is not.
I bought my wife a higher quality diamond, small, in a nice setting. it's from me, we both like it, and don't care anyone else opinions. I also know several people who have used sapphires and other non-precious stones.
Make it official. why not?
Just to be clear, this had nothing to do with me asking my girlfriend to marry me. It was just an argument with another girl.
gamby wrote:z31maniac wrote: I can't imagine planning a wedding if I wasn't engaged. And don't buy into the 3 months salary crap on a ring. I spent just over $1k (still more than I would have liked) but she picked it out and that's what she wanted.Funny how 2-months salary morphed into 3 in recent years. I spent $4500--and that was on the low end of what others around me spent. (...and I'm far from a high-roller--even then when I had my pre-marriage/mortgage disposable income)
Even two months salary is ridiculous in my eyes.
Then is that net or gross?
96DXCivic wrote: Just to be clear, this had nothing to do with me asking my girlfriend to marry me. It was just an argument with another girl.
just keep telling yourself that....
All rings say to me is that "this is the finger that the bad guy is gonna chop off"
Joey
That is why I use "Ring around the collar"... the guy did say "Till death do us part", right?
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