Here's a reason to hug/discipline your kids.

Dan:

My advice? Be "there" for Granny when she needs you. Be the son she never had (in the sense that you're willing to help.)

Don't start WWIII until Granny's gone and leaves the house to one of her POS relatives.

I might also suggest a house alarm if you don't already have one.

Thanks, but she already assures us that she will not leave the house to the kid or grandkiddies. If she does there will still be a home in upstate NY for sale; but it will be a 4BR 1894 model in nicer shape.

Dan

I get the hugs/kisses from my kids already. They tell their mom and I that they are glad now about the way we were with them growing up. Even their friends come over to talk out problems with us. Our youngest daughter (24yo) asked us last night if we would watch a friend of hers baby so she can go to night school. We watched her grow up and she spent a lot of time at our house, even lived with us for a short time till she got things together. Seems she now respects us more than her own parents that do nothing but put her down. She is married but hubby is also going to school (for masters degree) at the same time. She trusts us more than their own family and in-laws don't like her. She had a wild period but settled down. Still has remnants of that wild period - tattoos. And our kids say she's not the only one. Others have called me dad. Always made a habit out of listening without blowing my top, as long as they are honest to me. Will blow my top if I find out by other means and have.

Not much you can do but be a sounding board when she needs one. Maybe get her to move to FL w/her sisters and away from the problems. Or at least stay there a while, might help to get her head straight.

I have battled bad neighbors for years and sadly, the only time anything has improved is when somebody moves. My one neighbor, a good guy with two beautiful daughters, turned his place into a bunker to protect his stuff and his girls from the other neighbors, a family that liked to take in troubled teens. It didn't work though because crap always manages to seep in, he finally moved. After the troubled teens broke into my Jeep and stole my stereo (I know it was them because the footsteps in the fresh snow led from and to the problem house) I was set to move as well but thankfully the family moved and took their rotten kids with them. Now the only bad neighbor is the woman running the day care who lets her customers block the alley for 10 minutes while they pick up their kids. We have had several heated confrontations with her and her customers.

Buy Grandma a brass knuckle tazer...problem solved.

Steven