How should I handle this (neighbor question)

Ok, last week I came out of the house to find my mailbox 10' from the post it was on, and the other part of the post about a foot farther away. My first thought was "mailbox baseball" but when I picked up the mailbox, it wasn't crushed. In fact, it was only after a little more inspection that I did notice some damage. So, I was kinda puzzled, till a cop showed up at our door. I figured, it's only a mailbox and I don't have any donuts, so why is a cop here? Well, a neighbor saw the mailbox get hit by "a late model Ford Ranger" and got a partial plate #.
Well, I was sick as a dog so I didn't get the box put up till today. When talking to a neighbor about it (not the one who called) she said she thought she heard it happen and saw a white or gray, small pickup truck ripping down the street. She said there is a new family two doors down from me with a gray Ranger, and that she sees them speeding down our street on a regular basis.
So, I walk down there and sure enough, there is a gray, late model Ranger backed into the driveway (can't get a plate #) and it has damage high up on the right front fender. This has to be the piece of E36M3 that hit my mailbox.
So, after a loooooong story (thanks for hanging in there) the question is, what should I do? I could:
A) Walk down there and ask him if he knows anything about this and see if he's willing to pay for a mailbox and new post.
This can get dicey. I can have a bit of a temper. I have decent control of it now, but if this guy is an a$$hat I see things getting ugly possibly.
B) Call the cops (I have the seargents card here) and let them handle it.
I don't think it has to go as far as the cops. This guy is my neighbor and I'd like to handle it like civilized folks, but we're dealing with a guy who speeds through a residential neighborhood while kids play, and after sending a mailbox into orbit doesn't even stop to offer to put it back up, maybe he's not civilized.
C) Let it go. No harm no foul.
I don't like this one because it goes against my "if you are a prick, I'm going to let you know you're a prick" mentality.

let the cops sort it out. No reason to put yourself in a situation where things could get ugly if you know you have had trouble in the past.

I'll take "B" for $500. Like you said, the mailbox was knocked off the post, and nobody bothered to leave a note, knock on the door, etc. That kinda implies that they're not "neighborly" to being w/. Chances are in this case, reason and logic won't work. I would let the police do what we pay them for. YMMV.

You could always leave the remains of the mailbox on the hood of the truck.

Sends the message. It also tends to imply you are afraid of confrontation. Might lead them to come to you.

Hard to say, I think you need a bit of recon first to find out what sort of people you are dealing with first. Maybe talk to one of their neighbors?

I think you have to first figure out your objective(s) and then choose a course of action that will make it/them happen. For example, if the objective was to get reimbursed for your new mailbox/post, then walking down and inviting him to step up and fork over might be a good tactic. OTOH, if the guy's truck was taken without permission by someone in his household, this might all be news to him, so be ready for that reaction. If the objective was ultimately to make the guy slow the hell down, the tactics would also be different.

Also, there's a difference between (i) calling the cops and letting them handle it and (ii) calling the sergeant directly and saying, "Got an update and more details here, including a likely perpetrator; any advice on how I should deal with the guy?" If you give the sergeant the plate number of the suspect Ranger and it makes the SCMODS computer go "Bing!", well, you've saved yourself an encounter with a very nasty person. Or the sergeant may say, "We've never heard of this guy, so see if he's ready to do the good-neighbour thing without us having to send a car over."

Bottom line: a new neighbour who habitually endangers local kids is bad, but hoping that there's something you can do that will guarantee his karma bites him in the butt is maybe too optimistic.

(The official value of the above is $0.02 CDN.)

I say let it go, but keep your eye on that neighbor.

I installed my last mailbox with rebar reinforced brick.

It would have eaten that Ranger.

They screwed up...and didn't man up.Let the cops do their CSI on the fender and take it from there.

You're not at fault, or a rat, or a bad neighbor. Get everything documented.

DrBoost wrote: A) Walk down there and ask him if he knows anything about this and see if he's willing to pay for a mailbox and new post. This can get dicey. I can have a bit of a temper. I have decent control of it now, but if this guy is an a$$hat I see things getting ugly possibly.

If you can't control yourself, then this is out. You don't need the headaches that can come your way because of your inability to control yourself.

So that basically leaves B, if you want to do something. Not that the cops are likely to do anything. I'm tempted to write a sarcastic comment on that, but I think I'll let it pass.

But there is also the valid question of do you actually want to do anything? I'll agree with some of the others that a driver like this is bad to have around. Personally, I'd be most interested shutting them down. I've no love loss for people like that. But, if you really don't care and don't want the firestorm that will likely erupt (rocks through your windows, your cars keyed, etc), than let it all go.

Stealthtercel wrote: I think you have to first figure out your objective(s) and then choose a course of action that will make it/them happen. For example, if the objective was to get reimbursed for your new mailbox/post, then walking down and inviting him to step up and fork over might be a good tactic. OTOH, if the guy's truck was taken without permission by someone in his household, this might all be news to him, so be ready for that reaction. If the objective was ultimately to make the guy slow the hell down, the tactics would also be different. Also, there's a difference between (i) calling the cops and letting them handle it and (ii) calling the sergeant directly and saying, "Got an update and more details here, including a likely perpetrator; any advice on how I should deal with the guy?" If you give the sergeant the plate number of the suspect Ranger and it makes the SCMODS computer go "Bing!", well, you've saved yourself an encounter with a very nasty person. Or the sergeant may say, "We've never heard of this guy, so see if he's ready to do the good-neighbour thing without us having to send a car over." Bottom line: a new neighbour who habitually endangers local kids is bad, but hoping that there's something you can do that will guarantee his karma bites him in the butt is maybe too optimistic. (The official value of the above is $0.02 CDN.)

I agree w/ him on calling the sargent. Esp. since you already have contact info, and an open line of communication. Still don't know if I would confront the neighbor, though. These days that's not the safest thing to do, at least in my neck of the woods.

B) Call the cops (I have the seargents card here) and let them handle it.

/thread. Yes, at first, it seems like the chicken E36 M3 way to go, but if the guy was going to admit to doing it, he would've done it, six-pack and brand new mailbox in hand that day. So confronting him isn't a smart option, as he's the kind of piece of E36 M3 that'll start a war over it.

"Let it go" is not a bad option either. Just be sure to go berkeleying psycho on the new, WWIII-proof mailbox.

PS: The eye-witness with the partial tag # + the damage to the truck should be enough for the cops to do "something." Then again, they'll probably just do the whole "Do you want to press charges" thing, which gets a little squirrelly.

Well, what ever you do, make sure you share the results. I do think calling the Sarge, and ask how to proceed from there makes the most sense. That way if you go to talk to the twerp afterwards and things get ugly, you'll have some sort of back up for you being a decent law abiding citizen.

Mailboxes are cheaper than legal fees that could result if you get over there and asshat decides to swing at you, and/or you lose your cool and swing at him, etc.

Maybe I'm too laid back, but I'd chalk that up as "mistake" and just let it ride, secure in the knowledge that the neighbor is the kind of person who's too careless/stupid/jerky/etc to do the right thing. Gives you a little latitude to not feel guilty about not lending him a cup of sugar/ helping him unload heavy objects if you should get asked and/or laughing at his general misfortune when/if you should ever get the opportunity to do so.

In short, karma is a beeotch- sit back, let it work, and feel the schadenfreude.

Or just call the cops and let them deal with it.

rebelgtp wrote: Or just call the cops and let them deal with it.

woah woah woah, you cant fix a neighbor with a shotgun. Only a broken car.

edit: just in case anyone is out of the loop http://en.drugasmuga.com/news/autoworld/1838.html

GlennS wrote: woah woah woah, you cant fix a neighbor with a shotgun. Only a broken car. edit: just in case anyone is out of the loop http://en.drugasmuga.com/news/autoworld/1838.html

Hmmm I'm sure if you aim carefully you could "fix" your neighbor with a shotgun. Though much messier than when you take your dog to the vet

My feeling is that if you give him permission to do this, he will continue to be an ass, creating grief and aggravation for everybody. If he is forced to see that there is a down side to being a tool in his own neighborhood, peace is a bit more likely. Yes, I have done this in the past. It's generally a good idea to get along with the neighbors, and this goes for him as much as it does for you.

If they're driving around the neighborhood like idiots, then the mailbox might not be the only fatality.

I'd vote cops. The whole "lie down and be a victim" thing bugs me.

That said, building a cinderblock wall around your mailbox post doesn't seem like the worst idea.

gamby wrote: If they're driving around the neighborhood like idiots, then the mailbox might not be the only fatality. I'd vote cops. The whole "lie down and be a victim" thing bugs me. That said, building a cinderblock wall around your mailbox post doesn't seem like the worst idea.

Add tire spikes on the road side. gets em twice for one hit. J/K

Seriously though I would call the Sarge and see what he says. The Cops can check him out and find out the truth.

I'm not advocating laying down and being a victim, I just think the hassle and potential backlash from the kind of asshat who would do this to begin with is not worth the satisfaction of saying "I know it was you". Dr. Boost knows who did it and Mr. Asshat knows who's mailbox he plowed through. Going over there is not likely to yield the wanted result, which I assume is assurance the the world is not actually full of asshats who will cream a neighbor's mailbox and not own up to it. Life is too short to get tangled up in that. I say, let it go.

Build a mail box out of 4x4 structural steel post with a 1/8th in thick mail box welded on top. (available at Lowes.) Hang a 18" lobster boat wheel off of it and mount a brass bell on top. Total weight about 350#. (Pictures to follow)

Then late one evening drop by and let all the air out of a front tire of said gray ranger and let it ride. A pissing contest with a neighbor is no fun. I have a friend who has been to court several times dealing with a neighbor. You don't want to go there. Water balloons full of Roundup in the flower bed and yard do a pretty good job too.

Pictures. Sorry about the quality, it is dark and raining.

That is RAD.

B. Very B. No one gets irate when a cop confronts them.

Correction: No one who doesn't want to get arrested and brutalized gets irate when a cop confronts them. The same cannot be said for you confronting them.

Let's see... Reputation of driving like an a$$hat through the neighborhood, damaged mailbox with corresponding damage to their vehicle, not fessing up to the deed when it happened, witnesses with partial recognition. Let the sarge handle it. Hopefully it will come out better for the whole neighborhood that way. Mailbox now, what or who will be the next victim.

Then build a very solid mailbox. Maybe one with hidden internal spikes that drive into whatever hits it and collapses the surround.