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psteav
psteav GRM+ Memberand Dork
7/20/17 8:59 a.m.
Boost_Crazy wrote: In reply to mtn:
Be careful with this. Make sure she can support herself without any loans or credit cards for the next 7 years. But I suspect it is the best option available.
Yes, tread carefully with bankruptcy. It may be the best thing for year one and two, but could be a mistake later. She's young, he circumstances can improve pretty quickly. Unless there is other debt, the car alone doesn't seem to be enough to justify it. I don't know too much about the details, but I don't think she would be able to keep the car. I know people who declared bankruptcy when young and kicked themselves a couple years later. Don't forget to check what other consequences might be out there. How much worse is a bankruptcy than bad credit for things like insurance rates, housing background checks, employment background checks (can they even still check credit? I know it was controversial.) if you get to that point, maybe it would be better to just let them repo the car and take the credit hit rather then a full blown bankruptcy? Edit: I forgot about the EX. He may not be contributing much now, but is there a chance of him improving his situation and paying more support any time soon?

I'm the one who sent the PM about bankruptcy advice. It's my day job. I usually hesitate to post openly on GRM about it because of the "you made your bed, now lie in it" mindset some people have...but I gotta say, this has been a pretty civil discussion overall. Couple of points here to clear up some misconceptions:

1) Credit after bankruptcy improves quickly if you make the correct choices. (That's a very big if.) It's essentially a one-time nuke of your credit rating. It's not a seven-year death sentence- there's a note on your report that you filed for seven years, but someone who's careful and doesn't get in over their head again can generally rebuild their credit to the point of qualifying for a mortgage in 24-36 months.

2) As for loans and credit cards, Chapter 7 filers get car loan offers during the bankruptcy and a card offers from Capital One and Credit One immediately after their case closes. The credit card companies spin it as "rebuild your credit with our help!" There's no shortage of credit available to people who have filed - and unfortunately for some of them, that's why I get repeat customers.

3) There are a couple of options in bankruptcy that would allow her to keep the car and pay what it's worth right now as opposed to what she owes on the note. Also, Tuna mentioned a couple pages ago that there is more debt out there.

4) Landlords do check credit now - that's pretty much universal. A lot of employers do, especially in the financial sector, but most do not. Solution here is to make sure she's in a decent housing situation before she files. GIve it a couple years, and she'll be able to fix the credit and move out if she needs to.

5) A repo just means she's going to owe the creditor the balance of the loan less the ~$2000 they get after the creditor sells it at auction, plus she won't have the car to drive to work anymore, plus it's terrible for your credit. "Letting it go back to the creditor" is almost never the correct answer.

6) As for the ex, I can only speak to statistics, since I don't know him personally....but statistically? No. No, he's not going to pay more support soon. Or ever.

tuna55
tuna55 MegaDork
7/20/17 12:19 p.m.

To all GRMers wishing to give money:

That was not the original intent of this thread, but I welcome the incredible generosity of this board to help someone they have never met or conversed with in any way. It's humbling to see so many people asking how to directly help financially. It is amazingly helpful to just have people lending their knowledge and time to her issues even without the desire to donate.

I chatted with our church today to make sure that I wasn't stepping on any toes with regards to any help she may be getting, and it turns out that she hasn't asked them for any yet.

I know she's a month or two out of missing rent.

I don't want to start a general gofundme, yet, unless someone can convince me that it's worth it, but if any GRMers feel lead to give to her financially, aside from the very generous time and knowledge each of you has put into this cause, please Paypal me directly and 100% of everything will get to her to pay actual bills outstanding. If anyone has specific desires for their donations within or aside that, please tell me and I will make absolutely sure that is where it goes.

My E-mail address is BKB 001 at gmail dot com without spaces and whatnot. You all have my word that nothing will stay in my possession longer than a week to move it to cash and give it to her. The donor can specify method of getting it to her also.

Thanks again everyone.

SVreX
SVreX MegaDork
7/20/17 12:54 p.m.

In reply to tuna55:

You sure you want this bouncing through your own account?

tuna55
tuna55 MegaDork
7/20/17 12:57 p.m.
SVreX wrote: In reply to tuna55: You sure you want this bouncing through your own account?

I am guessing we're not talking about huge sums of money here, I'm OK with it. Gofundme charges 5%, and I have no desire to pour her heart out for her to the entire universe, which is really the only benefit other than my own time.

SVreX
SVreX MegaDork
7/20/17 1:00 p.m.

In reply to tuna55:

Tax liabilities, accountability, credibility, etc...

tuna55
tuna55 MegaDork
7/20/17 1:03 p.m.
SVreX wrote: In reply to tuna55: Tax liabilities, accountability, credibility, etc...

If you insist I can set one up just for you, but I don't see an issue and I don't want to give up the 5%.

SVreX
SVreX MegaDork
7/20/17 1:14 p.m.

Nope. Not insisting.

Just asking.

The_Jed
The_Jed PowerDork
7/21/17 9:58 a.m.

In reply to tuna55:

Email sent. I haven't used my email in so long I forgot the password.

tuna55
tuna55 MegaDork
7/21/17 10:17 a.m.

Thanks!

I don't see it yet, hopefully you got my super secret code for E-mailing right.

volvoclearinghouse
volvoclearinghouse UltraDork
7/21/17 10:37 a.m.

If we're talking a few hundred dollars here, even a thousand or two, it shouldn't cause an issue going thru tuna's account. I'm sure lots of us buy/sell cars and parts and stuff and more money than that bounces around unchecked.

And unless it's more than 10k, the Feds won't care.

Morbid
Morbid HalfDork
7/21/17 1:20 p.m.

I have some thoughts here, but, for her sake, I'll keep them off the boards. Tuna, you'll have a message from me shortly (Jed is sending me your info when he gets to work).

I will say, though, that looking into a phone provider like Ting or Google (yep, they have phones) is probably cheaper than what she has now, so that may be worth another look.

tuna55
tuna55 MegaDork
7/24/17 6:47 p.m.

Here are her refi loan rejections. They make sense

Derogatory public record or collection filed
Proportion of balance to credit limits too high on bank/other revolving accts
Length of time accounts have been established
Proportion of loan balances to loan amounts is too high

Sine_Qua_Non
Sine_Qua_Non SuperDork
7/25/17 12:20 a.m.

Honestly, it might be better to give her the money in short burst over a small period of weeks or months than as a windfall. That way it a controlled funds dispersement. People do crazy $hit with windfall money. It's great that you are doing this to help others in need and I wish I could help but I am not in a position to do so. Hope it all goes well for her and especially her kids.

tuna55
tuna55 MegaDork
7/25/17 7:02 a.m.

We sat down last night and applied for a few jobs and I went through her car insurance with her. She has a few tasks for this week to take care of.

tuna55
tuna55 MegaDork
7/26/17 7:26 a.m.
Sine_Qua_Non wrote: Honestly, it might be better to give her the money in short burst over a small period of weeks or months than as a windfall. That way it a controlled funds dispersement. People do crazy $hit with windfall money. It's great that you are doing this to help others in need and I wish I could help but I am not in a position to do so. Hope it all goes well for her and especially her kids.

If anyone desires to give money to her cause, I will disperse it however they see fit. $10/week or $50/month for medical bills or whatever they choose.

I have nothing to give, really. We're still paying off debt from our stupid house being broken.

4cylndrfury
4cylndrfury MegaDork
7/26/17 8:16 a.m.
tuna55 wrote: We sat down last night and applied for a few jobs and I went through her car insurance with her. She has a few tasks for this week to take care of.

I like this.

...very very much.

"I will help, you will do" is a great approach. Give a man a fish vs teach a man to fish and so on and so forth and all of these things...

volvoclearinghouse
volvoclearinghouse UltraDork
7/26/17 8:27 a.m.

Teach a man to fish...and eventually he will decide to microwave that fish in the office break room.

tuna55
tuna55 MegaDork
7/26/17 8:30 a.m.
4cylndrfury wrote:
tuna55 wrote: We sat down last night and applied for a few jobs and I went through her car insurance with her. She has a few tasks for this week to take care of.
I like this. ...very very much. "I will help, you will do" is a great approach. Give a man a fish vs teach a man to fish and so on and so forth and all of these things...

It's so rare that you find someone willing to listen and change that I may be too eager.

We have a deal, her and I. She cannot get annoyed that I bug her often, and I cannot get annoyed if she ignores me from time to time.

I really want to see this lady back on her feet. It's a super sad back story.

tuna55
tuna55 MegaDork
7/26/17 8:44 a.m.
volvoclearinghouse wrote: Teach a man to fish...and eventually he will decide to microwave that fish in the office break room.

Totally have done this, and totally with you nearby. Love me some fish.

tuna55
tuna55 MegaDork
7/26/17 9:56 a.m.

She knocked $30 per month on car insurance today. That's pretty cool!

STM317
STM317 Dork
7/26/17 10:11 a.m.

That's a step in the right direction! Thanks for keeping us updated.

mtn
mtn MegaDork
7/26/17 10:13 a.m.
tuna55 wrote: She knocked $30 per month on car insurance today. That's pretty cool!

That is pretty significant. Good job!

tuna55
tuna55 MegaDork
7/26/17 10:15 a.m.

Bad news is that applying for and getting denied for auto refi cost her come credit score, 625 from 660, so she did not ask them to redo her policy based on the higher credit score just yet. BOO!!!

Flynlow
Flynlow HalfDork
7/26/17 4:14 p.m.

Dunno if it helps with the monthly bills or not, but virgin mobile is doing a special deal of $1 for a year of unlimited talk, text, and data. Only caveats I've seen are that taxes aren't included (usually a couple dollars per month) and that you need an iPhone. I purchased an iPhone SE through them as part of the deal for $279, making my total for a new phone and year of service $280. Link:

https://www.virginmobileusa.com

That considerably beat out the deal I was getting through cricket of $45/month for 8gb data, unlimited talk and text, but no issues with their service while I had them either, and they were cheaper than ATT or Verizon. No penalties for going over data, just throttling after 8gb.

spitfirebill
spitfirebill UltimaDork
7/26/17 6:26 p.m.
tuna55 wrote: Bad news is that applying for and getting denied for auto refi cost her come credit score, 625 from 660, so she did not ask them to redo her policy based on the higher credit score just yet. BOO!!!

FICO sucks.

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