I don't understand love languages, what does a freshly waxed car say to you?

So I drive to some ghastly plant nursery today, buy some type of small bush/tree, dig a hole and plant the flipping thing.  My wife is over the moon.  I don't get it.  If you were in a mall parking lot, and her fiesta st were on the other side of the mall, you would see her paint pop. I mean I jet seal it, wax it, polish it, you  name it. This car is beautiful.   Door jambs, inner doors, inside the rear hatch is so shiny and clean you can see your reflection.  We live in Maine for crying out loud and I fluid film the car in the winter.  I make sure the windows are not only spotless, but rain-x'd as well.  What does this mean to her?  Squat.  I pick up some plant that will be dead in a year, dig a hole and throw it in: I'm husband of the year.  We have been married over 20 years, and I still don't get it.

You care about cars, she cares about the yard. You did something specifically for her that you do not necessarily also take pleasure in doing, it was just for her. Good job! 

Roots hate air, and make sure the trunk flare is at ground level.  Pack the dirt super tight around the root ball, then water the berkeley out of it for the next week or two.  Maybe it won't be dead in a year.

WAX ON, WAX OFF.  Make her watch Karate Kid with you

Acts of service.

Receiving gifts.

Quality time.

Words of affirmation.

Physical touch.

Your sweetie might prefer one only, or a combination therof.  The fun is figuring out what she likes.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Five_Love_Languages

Been married 31 years.  

Still trying to figure which one of the five is my wife’s love language. 

I mowed the back yard for the first time this year. When asked I said,  "because you wanted me to." She was very pleased. 

Happy spouse,  happy house. 

Mother's day was also my wife's birthday.

I left the house at 6 AM, went to my second ever autocross and was gone almost the whole day. She's fine with it.

I don't know how this is relevant, just thought I would put it on here. I guess my point is that every relationship works (or doesn't) in a unique way.

It sounds to me like you're doing a great job. Be proud.

I don’t touch her car except to change the oil.  That’s her baby and she keeps it clean.  If it were up to me it would get washed once a year at the end of winter like my truck and wrx.  

Love is NOT having to detail her car, in my world.  I love that she does it and likes it that way.  One day though i’m going to have to finish her chevelle or she might not be happy with me.  

That you do all that to her car has become the norm, and once in a while you need to do something out of the ordinary or unexpected  to keep things from being blah.  

The Doc:  what does a freshly waxed car say to you?

Thank You.

In reply to thedoc :

Don't be so modest thedoc. You very well know exactly what love languages are. You were just hoping that the whole clean car thing would be part of it. She may like that you do that and love you for it but it isn't THE act of service she wants you to know she cares about. Take her "Over the moon" reaction as a great thing as she just let you know that this is something important to her for you to REMEMBER. 

A freshly waxed car in my experience says, it's gonna rain today.  Happens to me just about everytime even if rain isn't in the forecast for a week.  

Maybe some nice window boxes planted with a variety of lovely annuals and attached to her car would be a nice touch?  You know, combine the plant thing with the car thing.

1988RedT2 said:

Maybe some nice window boxes planted with a variety of lovely annuals and attached to her car would be a nice touch?  You know, combine the plant thing with the car thing.

Great idea! Here's an example...

The trick is realizing that she cares as much about the clean car as you care about that plant.   Which is approximately zero. 

My wife won't go with the tree out of the car, but I thank you for the suggestion. She laughed about how we have zero interest in each other's wants.  Really not that true, I do like a nice lawn, she does like a nice car.  Sadly, I do think a lawn would be improved by a ton of gravel and then some cars parked on it.  Years ago I tried to float the idea of a static display of a model aa truck.  It didn't fly.  Nor did the idea of a fire truck in the back yard.  You can't tell me all the neighbor hood kids wouldn't have wanted to use it as a jungle gym.  I looked at two fire trucks.  They were awesome, but I digress.  Thank God we have a great marriage and she more than supports my car habit.  We were looking at houses and she tried to find one with a barn.  She said she did not care how many cars I had, as long as she did not have to look at them. 

She also drives a fiesta st as her daily and kid taxi.  She really did it for me.  We traded in her ford flex for it!

Thanks for your input guys!