I had a squalid punk/musician/motorcycle racer shared house for years, ending when Mrs. motomoron and I bought house project #1. There were nutcase/oddball/dirtbags too numerous to recall, but I'll never forget Wayne.
Wayne was a hairdresser who rode a Honda Magna lowered far enough he had to run rigid struts rather than shocks on the rear. To keep it from falling over in the garage (on it's not-shortened side stand) I provided a piece of 2x12 to roll the front wheel up on.
Wayne initially looked like Lorenzo Lamas in "Renegade" , later adopting dreads and a a fake Rasta Patois that was equal parts pathetic and hilarious.
He was late with the rent every month, and it arrived invariably at midnight on the 5th in the form of a check from a different woman, every month.
The Wayne Story:
One month he's really late w/ the rent - it's like the 8th - on the 10th we'd incur a 10% penalty. I arrived home on a Monday morning (motorcycle shop guy schedule) and lo and behold, there's Wayne's bike. I knock on his door, and predictably he's busy getting busy. I make an impassioned plea for the rent and he says: "Dude, like don't sweat bank so harsh maaan, I have it today!"
I'm in the garage all day - later I go check, and he's left by coasting the bike far enough away that I couldn't hear him leave. I'm a little furious. I look in his usual haunts - no Wayne. The next day I decide to make one more try. I go to the hair salon - bingo! the Magna is out front.
I go In - I'm wearing black Vanson leathers head to foot w/ motocross boots, armored gloves, and a black helmet with a black shield. I look just like the assassin dudes on black enduro bikes in the action movies. I stride purposefully to Wayne's station and ask for the rent. He gives me his best deer in the headlight look, so I barge him against the counter, and dig in his pocket (eww) to produce his ginormous wad of cash.
I peel of the $440 the master bedroom rented for and tossed the rest on the floor. I said "Wayne, you said yesterday you'd "have the rent today" then you snuck out. You're done. Have you'r E36 M3 out of the house by midnight the 15th"
To which he said "Today?? Dooood! I thoought you meant "TWO DAYS!".
I don't miss the room mates.