Life for sale (or Repo)

Taken from Craigslist but edited to keep it family friendly:

Well here we are another year 2009 ahhhhhhhh

Well what I have for sale is a life of Debt, illusions and bill collectors

I think for 1,000,000 I’ll let it go. The price will include a complete 20,000 equipment only fabrication shop a beautiful house in the country 3,500 sqft 30 x 40 barn 13 acres ahhh the American dream!!!!!! It will also buy you 12 useless employees 4 large break even contracts and a business name that has become completely ruined because CORPORATE AMERICA SUCKS d!#$. I have however made it 5 years so I guess I beat the statistic.

If you don’t want to buy the dream that’s fine I’m just going to screw everybody Like I got screwed. Bankruptcy $(#*%#$

Chrysler financial, you can have my diesel truck back, that’s 20,000 over mileage and smashed because I just hit a deer. I looked cool in it for a while, but I just bought a 95 S-10 cash and I love it. So stop calling me five times a day and come get the piece of crap!

Btw, how do you expect people to pay your late charges if they can’t even make the regular payment? Also if you called me on Tuesday I bet my situation won’t be any different Wednesday. Bastards. screw you I’m going to hide it

American express I was a good customer to you. Once I was 10 days late you canceled my card. You will never get your money. Bastards

53rd I would really like to keep my camper but if you insist on coming to get it because I’m 45 days late come and get it. I’ve got a freaking tent. Chryslers going to take my freaking truck and I’m sure my S-10 won’t pull it. Bring a freaking shovel because there’s 8 feet of snow pushed in front of it because all it freaking does is snow around here.

Speaking of snow got some snowmobiles, there going back to! I loved riding them but I financed them to pay the 12 useless employees to work on the 4 large break even contracts I have. Behind on them same story come and get em bastards

The only thing in my life I won’t sell is my 4 year old daughter (she is a keeper). My very sexy supportive wife and the dog. You can have the rest of the illusion.

Material bull E36 M3. We learned our lesson.

Love to tell you more but I’ve got to search for a job so I can pay taxes to support all the Bailout money we gave the people that are going to repo my stuff and put America in this situation. I wonder what I’ll be paid with, food?

Don’t think the dollar illusion can go on much longer.

Keep the faith protect your kids. Your family is all that matters

A Broke Michigan resident

wow. either this guy really hit some hard times or he was living well beyond his means. Gotta love the dark sense of humor though.

curtis wrote: wow. either this guy really hit some hard times or he was living well beyond his means.

Probably a little (or a lot) of both. Like most of America.

whiners...sheesh!

Dear Michigan Whiner,

Yes bankruptcy sucks, but let's see why you were there. How is that 50" HD Plasma treating you? You owned a business for 5 years and yes you deserve a treat but why did you deserve 3500sf on 13 acres with a pole barn filled with a wrecked Dodge truck, a fifth wheel trailer, multiple snowmobiles and the rest of the stuff you have in there? When you start a business it is the same as starting a family... except more so. If you think having 14 kids before you get married and living off the system is stupid then it is no different then running up your personal and business credit without sustainable income.

I am not saying that you should not use your credit. On the contrary I suggest you use it wisely. Your business should always have 6 months of operating capital in reserve ant any one time. That means if the government walks in on January 1 and locks your doors you should still be able to pay your companies bills and employees salaries, insurance and taxes for 180 days. If you can't do that with your current business plan than you must reorganize your profit plan. I suggest charging more for labor than what you are currently.

Financial growth at a level higher than 10% per year is unsustainable, and at 10% per year it will plateau after 10 years. Be cautious with your expansion, be cautious with your reserves and be cautious with your credit. Don't abuse any of them, your business will fail if you do.

Personal finances must be treated just like your business with one exception: If you spend more than you make you can not simply write yourself a raise. YOU MUST CUT OUT THE UNNECESSARY EXPENDITURES. Financing a new Dodge truck is fine if your business can afford to pay for it in 24 months, if it is used for the business. If you are personally using the business truck you should also pay for the use to the businesses asset. If you can not pay you should not play.

Most successful businesses were started on a simple foundation of thrift, customer service and a good product. If your business model fits this pattern and you still fail then there is something missing in the equation that makes your customers not need you rproduct. Selling air conditioners to rural Africans is fine if they have power.

Quit your bitching about Michigans economy. We are all in this mess, and we are all going through this. I went bankrupt, but before I did I made sure that any unnecessary expenditures were cut out before it happenned. Guess what, it hurt like hell but my children have a roof over their heads, my wife has a car to drive and I managed to keep my car.

A broke Michigan resident who is not whining.

He should persue a career in marketing. They have deen selling illusions for a long time.

Sounds like my last boss. He bought a 50 year old business. For 5 years the business was doing respectable(paying the bills with a little profit). He brought in a new manager and assistant manager(me). For the next five years the business grew at about 8% a year.

Then he decided to buy a new house, new boat and two new cars. Two years after that the business went under.

And this was well before any recession or even the peak of prosperity.

Hey Boost, do you know where that was posted?

It actually sounds a LOT like a guy who owned a shop I used to service at NAPA. After telling the guy he bit off more than he could chew he "fired" me as a supplier. If it is him he would either post it in Grass Lake/Ann Arbor or in Lansing...

Did someone call the REPOman?

John Brown wrote: Hey Boost, do you know where that was posted? It actually sounds a LOT like a guy who owned a shop I used to service at NAPA. After telling the guy he bit off more than he could chew he "fired" me as a supplier. If it is him he would either post it in Grass Lake/Ann Arbor or in Lansing...

Yeah, it was posted on Jan 29 in the Detroit section. Could this be the guy???

That's a man who, if you came to take away his daughter, would defiantly kill you on the spot.

Having to move 8 feet of snow just to repossess a camping trailer? I'm surprised the repo guys in Michigan don't whine more.

Apexcarver wrote: Did someone call the REPOman?

Nah. These guys are the Repo Men.

"I don't want no Commies in my car. And no Christians, either!"

Oh berkeley, someone call a whaaaaaaaaaambulance!

It sounds like my old boss too. He was a much nicer guy before the business he grew from the ground up started to get successful... they he started to get a little nasty around the edges towards his employees (8 years with no raises.. I was out of there)

He did not buy a lot of nice things, he only recently (in the last three years) traded in his escort wagon on a pius.. but he made some boneheaded business moves that still make me shake my head in disbliefe

I remember he and the one salesman took my truck and went up to NYC for an auction. They returned with a truck full of broken cable winches. He had some idea of fixing them and selling them to a theatre to automate their curtains and pipes.. never happened. We never got them fixed, never found the paperwork on how they were wired, never even found out what their ratings were... They are still sitting in the warehouse, taking up precious space when the junkyard would have given him a couple thousand for the scrap last year.

We really needed more Lekos and Pars.. but he came back with those..

DrBoost wrote:

John Brown wrote: Hey Boost, do you know where that was posted? It actually sounds a LOT like a guy who owned a shop I used to service at NAPA. After telling the guy he bit off more than he could chew he "fired" me as a supplier. If it is him he would either post it in Grass Lake/Ann Arbor or in Lansing...

Yeah, it was posted on Jan 29 in the Detroit section. Could this be the guy???

I went by his house... his Dodge 3500 has front end damage sitting on the side of his garage. I did not see a Chevy S10 but I am going to assume that this was him.

That's hillarious!!

hmm, 3500sq/ft home for a family of 3 and 4 snow mobiles, what could go wrong, that is a perfect model of minimalism and efficiency!

sounds like the repo buisiness would be a good job choise