Mood killer.

I haven't seen Mrs. Duece in three weeks. I'm headed to the airport in a couple of hours to pick her up. My wife, who I love very much. Finally get to be in the same place.
To kill time I took the dog for a walk in the woods. And then I gave the dog an hour long bath in every anti skunk product and old wives tale that could be looked up on the internet and be purchased locally. The dog still smells a bit (I think some got inside her ear), I think my hands still smell (I should have worn rubber gloves washing the dog) the house smells.
Super romantic evening coming up.

I'm not sure what is worse, that or pulling porcupine quills out of a dog's snout.

Do what teenagers and pot heads do: Axe body spray. Gallons and gallons of Axe.

From what you've told us about Mrs. Deuce, I wouldn't worry. The Dog Incident will just be part of reassuring her that she's finally back home. Of course, you may have to put up with remarks along the lines of "So, the dozen beautiful red roses are to kill the smell?" but that's how you know you're actually married, not just with a girlfriend.

Ian F wrote: I'm not sure what is worse, that or pulling porcupine quills out of a dog's snout.

We did that two years ago. She is not a smart dog.

The dog LOVES my wife. She will want to sit on her lap and lick her hand and spend the whole evening being as close to her as possible. Should be fun. I may pick up some AXE .

Patchouli oil

RossD wrote: Patchouli oil

I'd rather smell the skunk. I swear to God that E36 M3 smells worse than a dumpster fire.

RossD wrote: Patchouli oil

NO! Patchouli oil smells like dirty hippies. It only smells good to other dirty hippies.

I don't know what Patchouli oil smells like, but from 3rd-party impressions, it seems to be much worse than AXE.

GameboyRMH wrote: I don't know what Patchouli oil smells like, but from 3rd-party impressions, it seems to be much worse than AXE.

It is.

I'd much rather smell nearly anything, even diesel smoke than Patchouli oil.

If you see a white person with dreadlocks, there's a 90% chance they will smell of Patchouli Oil and B.O.

When Milo rolled in skunk E36 M3 (literal skunk poop), we first cut a bunch of fur off, then washed the area thoroughly in a mixture of baking soda, hydrogen peroxide, and Dawn dishsoap. Killed the smell completely, including on our hands.

Lucky he's a white dog, I think it did bleach the fur some.

mazdeuce wrote: The dog LOVES my wife. She will want to sit on her lap and lick her hand and spend the whole evening being as close to her as possible. Should be fun. I may pick up some AXE...

...for the dog!

Introduce a jar of Vick's Vapo-Rub into your love-making.

Huckleberry wrote: Introduce a jar of Vick's Vapo-Rub into your love-making.

It's only kinky the first time.

Huckleberry wrote: Introduce a jar of Vick's Vapo-Rub into your love-making.

the tingle means it's working

So what Im hearing is you're picking up Mrs deuce from the airport and surprising her with a night out on the town while the oldest babysits and works on the smell.

nose plugs wont get in the way of the important parts doing what theyre designed to do

Here's an idea, AXE to cover up the skunk, and then rose petals strewn about to cover up the AXE! So romantic!

Edit: Oh one more idea, drop off the dog at a professional dog cleaner and let them take care of it. If the dog's not home when you get home, that's fine...

Stefan wrote:

GameboyRMH wrote: I don't know what Patchouli oil smells like, but from 3rd-party impressions, it seems to be much worse than AXE.

It is. I'd much rather smell nearly anything, even diesel smoke than Patchouli oil. If you see a white person with dreadlocks, there's a 90% chance they will smell of Patchouli Oil and B.O.

LOL. You can smell Patchouli oil on a hippy from about the same distance you can smell skunk on a dog.

Look at it this way potentially every time you and your wife smell skunk it will have a meaning that only you two will understand.

GameboyRMH wrote: Here's an idea, AXE to cover up the skunk, and then rose petals strewn about to cover up the AXE! So romantic! Edit: Oh one more idea, drop off the dog at a professional dog cleaner and let them take care of it. If the dog's not home when you get home, that's fine...

Yep. You've already acknowledged that the dog will be actively cock-blocking, so get that berkeleyer out of the house!

I remember when my friend's dog got sprayed by a skunk when I was a kid. 25 years later, I can still smell it. That's one that's seared into the memory banks forever. Good luck!

You know how you stop smelling stuff after a while?

Pick her up in the MGB GT. Those damn MGs all have a pervasive smell that will over-ride whatever else is lingering. Put the dog in the back just to work all in so her nose is trained by the time you get home.

EDIT:

Senior moment...Was thinking Keith was the OP when I posted the above!

Huckleberry wrote: Introduce a jar of Michael Vick's Vapo-Rub into your love-making.

Damn, that's harsh, man.

Massengil douche is supposed to be the hot tip for de-skunking dogs. Really.