My turn for a self-help thread?

Interesting topic.

My wife is a terrible clutz. Horrible spatial awareness. She can look right at something on the floor and still stub her toe on it. She can be cautiously aware of something on the floor going one direction, but on the return pass hit it squarely. Hits her head on stuff all the time. I really do fear for her safety as she gets older. 

I, alternatively, can walk around the house with my eyes closed. My balance is ok, but not great (lifelong rider who can barely wheelie or trackstand).

You mention that in younger days you had good balance and coordination. Did you ever get any concussions falling from the bike? 

What types of instrument do you play? Guitar?

In reply to pheller :

No concussions that I'm aware of. I don't remember every hitting my head really, and I've never had any wrecks/accidents that caused me to lose consciousness. 

What's weird about my spatial awareness is that sometimes it's completely fine, yet others it's like I have absolutely none. We've had the same shelf above our washer for the entire 5-years we've lived here, yet for some reason earlier this year I'd seem to forget it's there & hit my head on it almost every time. It hasn't happened for a few months now though. 

I play bass, but I'm not really a normal bassist. I play pretty weird E36 M3 most of the time. 

In reply to Pete Gossett (Forum Supporter) :

I think having the strings on backwards may have something to do with "playing weird E36 M3."

kidding!

Pete Gossett (Forum Supporter) said:

I play 6-string bass & mostly prog-rock/metal/fusion type stuff. Generally all original material. I literally can't play blues because the songs are so similar that I get lost & forget where the bridge goes for one song vs. the next, or other details like that.

My brain definitely gets in my way sometimes, but there's definitely an unconscious/muscle-memory issue with the mechanics of my playing too.

Stage fright is something that's been an intermittent issue with me. There's been about an equal mix of gigs where I've absolutely loathed going on stage vs. those where I can't wait to be in front of the crowd. In general that's mostly been an internal/emotional thing vs. being influenced by the venue/crowd or any other external factor.

The fact that you play a 6 string bass and are in an original prog rock band are probably the issue  There's like actual stuff you have to think about to play that and it not sounds like total E36 M3 (where normally it just sounds like regular E36 M3, sorry). I would agree with Curtis to try and pick up and try and play some easy/boring/improvy (is that a word?) type things and see how you can hang. Even just picking up an acoustic guitar, mandolin, ukelele, something different to jog your brain a bit may be helpful. 

My only other advice is to start drinking, maybe a little bit, but I am not one for self medication personally. In any case good luck with it, I am trying to pick things up again now and it's a struggle remembering how to play at all. Smooth isn't my issue, absolutely sloppy is so I am the opposite of the spectrum. 

I know someone who is very ADD and has a lot of anxiety. He can only keep a job because he's also pretty brilliant with computers and works for people who understand his limitations. The way he manages to calm his mind is to exercise A LOT. This seems to work really well for him, but he also has to spend a lot of time doing it. 

Anyway, to the extent that the source of the problem is is above your neck, exercising may help. 

Someone noted you play bass with the strings flipped - true story? I've recently been listening to a little bit of Jeff Schmidt, who does this - love it. 

https://youtu.be/TF4sJHBIYEo

Good luck sorting this out. 

barefootskater (Shaun) said:

In reply to Pete Gossett (Forum Supporter) :

I think having the strings on backwards may have something to do with "playing weird E36 M3."

 

kidding!

Oh that's 100% truth! At the time in high school when I first picked it up it didn't seem like the string orientation mattered much - it's just bass, there's only 4-strings anyway, and it's not like I'll ever use more than one at a time - right? At some point a few months into it I started to feel a little frustrated, but at that point I'd learned a few really basic songs, so the idea of restringing it correctly & having to "start over" seemed insurmountable. Besides I had no clue how to restring it, didn't know anyone who did(that I knew of at the time) and probably couldn't have afforded to pay anyone anyway. 

A few years later I started to conceptualize that it could actually open up some possibilities for me that might not work too well for people who play with normal stringing, but that was about the time I severed my wrist, sold all my gear & figured I was done playing. 

In reply to procainestart :

Wow, I can't believe I've never heard of Jeff before - that's amazing!!!

But yeah, that's pretty much me other than I suck at fretless & play short-& medium-scale basses due to my wrist injury.

In reply to Pete Gossett (Forum Supporter) :

That was a joke, as I can't seriously figure out how it could possibly matter. 
Joking aside though, I'm finding as I get older that my problems are rarely solved by just doubling down on "fundamentals and practice" or traditional fixes. I almost always have to approach the issue from a different angle until something clicks.
With skating, for example, I would struggle to learn tricks and stay consistent. I would talk to folks who were better, read up, and I'd know all the steps and techniques that were prudent. I actually quit for years because I got frustrated at not being able to progress. it wasn't until I watched some old footage and noticed that they weren't doing all the technical tricks but somehow the style they were putting into simpler maneuvers was so appealing. So I started over. New approach. I worked on style and once I could replicate what I had seen from those kids in the 60s/70s, I found that some of the things that I had struggled with and quit over, now those things came naturally. 
Im not sure how to apply that to the bass, but that's how my mind works when facing a problem like this. 

How are you with other forms of stimulation? Like having some music on while working. I have adhd and it really sucks trying to do things that im not very interested in. If i try to focus on something, my mind will go anywhere else but what i need to be doing. In school id start at the same page of a book for a while, i was "reading" but not comprehending any of it. 
 

i have also found that while the adhd is bad, the anxiety i had was making it far worse than it needed to be. Once i got my anxiety down closer to a normal level, i had an easier time doing things. Sometimes i have to just walk away because im just wasting my time trying to work on something. For me, small accomplishments really fuel me for more. Like i can go from a complete mental log jam, cant get crap done. I check a small thing off the list, i feel a bit better and motivated. Check off more stuff and it just gets better. 
 

like or play drums? I find keeping myself more focused on more things is good for me. I prefer manual transmissions for this reason. Keeps both hands and both feet busy. Ling before i got things kinda figured out, i only felt "focused" when i was driving way too fast. It took all my focus. Monitoring the road, the engine, the gear, the speedo, feet ready, hands ready, etc.  i do better with more things to focus on. 
also im 39 and just found put all my issues about a year ago. It now makes sense why i had so much trouble in school. 

I am starting to believe that if humans work to the point of exhaustion more often, like once a day, that many mental obstacles would dissolve. 

In reply to TJL (Forum Supporter) :

Honestly most of the time I find music(or the tv) on while working to be a distraction - except occasionally when I need that distraction to stay on-task.

I've never really learned(or had much desire to learn) any other instruments. I have a couple acoustic guitars & a while after my wrist injury had healed I picked one of them up, thinking it may be easier due to the lighter gauge strings. I grew frustrated pretty quickly though. I've had several keyboards over the years & while I enjoy playing around with them, my hands aren't really big enough to be a keyboardist/pianist & the injury in my right hand only complicates it since I don't have much spread of my fingers. Really though I've always felt like there was no reason to work on learning any other instrument until I'd run out of ideas on bass - fortunately that hasn't happened yet!

In reply to RossD :

Well I generally slept better, but that's an additional reason my I didn't touch my bass for over 8-months this year. 

I'm intrigued, have you posted your stuff here? I remember some vids on the short scale 8 string but did I miss others?

In reply to Antihero (Forum Supporter) :

I don't remember if I did. I honestly don't have any that I was very happy with the quality of my performance, but I'll dig something up & send it to you. 

My first lesson tonight was awesome. I have a ton of homework, but they're exercises that will really help me out. We're doing 1-hour lessons every 2 weeks, so at least I have a little time to work on things. 

Pete Gossett (Forum Supporter) said:

In reply to Antihero (Forum Supporter) :

I don't remember if I did. I honestly don't have any that I was very happy with the quality of my performance, but I'll dig something up & send it to you. 

My first lesson tonight was awesome. I have a ton of homework, but they're exercises that will really help me out. We're doing 1-hour lessons every 2 weeks, so at least I have a little time to work on things. 

Cool, can't wait to hear it!

Another +1 for Tai chi and if you have access to a pool, swimming, floating and adapting Tai Chi to an aquatic environment. The resistance of the water does two things, assist in slowing the motions even more, and allows for an ever so slow development of strength in small muscles that provide stabilization. The thing that is strange about Tai chi is initially when you start you'll probably want to go faster than you should and it will feel fairly fluid when you do so. The challenge actually comes in going as slow and deliberately as you possibly can and maintaining proper breathing while you do so, but also when you go incredibly slow tiny minute tremors will make themselves known. Overtime and practice and discipline in practice, those tremors will lessen and you will be able to go even slower. Practicing Tai chi in water helps to showcase those shortcomings and the resistance also helps the body improve. 

Swimming itself is great for a couple reasons, One of which though is that if you are too mechanical and deliberate in your form (with the exception of forearm and hand) that you will sink like a stone. 

Anxiety might play a role The Tai chi will help with that. The animals will help with that. Realizing that with projects, it's like eating an elephant, you have to do it one bite at a time, should help some. Earlier in their careers members of the red hot chili peppers found that playing wearing nothing but a tube sock helped with their anxiety as the audience was distracted from the playing. Autocrossing you would have to wear closed-toed shoes, a helmet and a tube sock. The sock would not need to be nomex or fire retardant. Take extra sunscreen and a wide brimmed hat when working the course. 

In reply to Antihero (Forum Supporter) :

I tried to send you an older vid last night, but it's too long for messenger. I'll try to record something & send it over though. 

In reply to captdownshift (Forum Supporter) :

I can't swim at all. I sink like a rock. I've taken lessons as a kid & tried several times since then. Honestly though I hate being wet anyway. 

Pete Gossett (Forum Supporter) said:

In reply to Antihero (Forum Supporter) :

I tried to send you an older vid last night, but it's too long for messenger. I'll try to record something & send it over though. 

Awesome, or if you want I'll send you my email address

WoW.


A lot of what you've written really hits home, Pete.   Not everything is exactly the same, but enough is similar that I will mull all of this over and see if there is anything useful that I can add to the conversation.   I will also talk to my wife about it, who coincidentally, was the one who figured out that I had ADHD (when I was 49).    She has been a great help to me, though we are both still learning.

Pete Gossett (Forum Supporter) said:

In reply to Antihero (Forum Supporter) :

I tried to send you an older vid last night, but it's too long for messenger. I'll try to record something & send it over though. 

And it's awesome, you are too hard on yourself because you aren't lacking smooth

Snowdoggie (Forum Supporter) said:

There are a lot of books out there about Tao and guitar or Tao and music. I have a few on my shelf. 

This is the guy you are looking for. His book is Zen Guitar which is where you need to be.

http://www.zenguitar.com

RossD said:

I am starting to believe that if humans work to the point of exhaustion more often, like once a day, that many mental obstacles would dissolve. 

I Second this thought. My anecdotal evidence is that whenever I was using a gym (pre 2020) to lift heavy weights not only was I stronger but EVERYTHING was better, life in general. I called it "lifting heavy E36 M3 therapy." Thankfully without paying gym membership I was finally able to save up and buy a folding squat lift rack for my garage so I can begin therapy again soon, but physical exhaustion, however you can get there, I highly recommend.

Small update: I had a bit of an epiphany yesterday. I kinda figured the reason why I had less anxiety when playing with a group/band vs. solo was mostly due to not being the sole focus of attention. However, what I realized is the less I can hear myself play, the lower my anxiety is. Weird.

I also made another correlation to music - I've never ever been the type to work well under pressure or tight deadlines. Not that I won't necessarily get whatever it is done, but I'm almost guaranteed to screw something up in the process. Fortunately it's often either minor and/or easily correctable.

However, it occurred to me today that since music is (generally) time-based, if I have the slighted ADHD/brain-fart type thing, I sort of have a mini panic attack for a fraction of a second - that almost always causes me to make a wrong decision & screw up. 

One last thing. as I mentioned at the start I have no dancing skills at all. But historically that's also meant that I can't really move anything but my hands/fingers when I play. I discovered yesterday that I can actually wander around aimlessly while playing now. Though it doesn't seem to make my proficiency any better or worse. 

Hey now, wandering aimlessly is leaps and bounds above my stage moves lol