Parts Counter Clerk

In reply to Bobzilla:

Wow, those are some good ones! That header story is classic. It reminds me of one of the employees that I used to work with that told me that "all GM 350's are the same engine". He didn't believe me when I tried to tell him that Olds, Pontiac, Buick, AND Chevy all made completely different 350ci V8's that shared very little parts. He didn't get it. I told him that it would be like saying that a Ford 5.0L and a Chevy 5.0L V8 were the same. Yeah, he thought they were the same too. DOH!!!

oops.... some people should not be selling parts there, Silver

Shortly after GM started mix n' match engines I had a guy come in wanting spark plugs for his 6.6 Trans Am. Well, GM had seen fit to equip those cars with either a 400 Pontiac or a 403 Olds. So I asked the guy which engine he had, he got PISSED and said (paraphrasing) 'It's a Pontiac, dumbass.' Okey doke, I sold him Pontiac plugs. He comes storming back in an hour or two later wanting my ass on a platter. You guessed it, spark bolts no fit. I swapped him the 403 Olds plugs for the Pontiac plugs and as he was stalking out informed him (sweetly) that his car had a 403 Olds. He started screaming, nearly foaming at the mouth, the store owner and manager both came running over and escorted him out the door.

We used to sell 'test pipes', these were meant to be a temporary replacement for a catalytic converter so you could see if it was plugged. Had a guy buy one for some flavor of Ford product, he came back in a day or so later saying 'won't fit'. Okay, Ford used all different configurations of converter so anything is possible. But it has clamp and bolt marks and when I stuck my hand inside it came out covered with exhaust soot. Obviously it could not be resold as new (prerequisite for returning a part). I called the owner over and explained the situation, the guy went OFF. Said I wasn't there, how the hell could anyone as dumb as me even breathe, questioned my heritage et. The owner finally gave him his money but told him as he handed it to him 'don't ever set foot back in my store'. The guy waled past me hollered 'HAH HAH!' and I wished him a nice day.

You guys need to start a blog.

i used to work at autozone also...

started as a co-op from the local technical college. good boss who had been in the business for 20+ years and he taught me alot. like how to deal with customers. no matter what he always called them sir. i took the same approach. One day one of ou "regulars" ( read theif) came in and tried to return the same brake pads he had warranty swapped out 3 times in one week. none of the other csr's had caught it by looking at history. i caught him and told the manager. this was right after i became a manager so he had me deal with it. i told him i could not return them and the promptly got the set thrown at me. taking the que from the manager i told the "gentleman" sir, your a berkeleying shiny happy person sir get out of the store and never ever come back. seeing i was bigger than him he promptly left.

i got a raise shortly after that but it was the beginning of the end for m hope in humanity

Jensenman wrote: Shortly after GM started mix n' match engines I had a guy come in wanting spark plugs for his 6.6 Trans Am. Well, GM had seen fit to equip those cars with either a 400 Pontiac or a 403 Olds. So I asked the guy which engine he had, he got PISSED and said (paraphrasing) 'It's a Pontiac, dumbass.' Okey doke, I sold him Pontiac plugs. He comes storming back in an hour or two later wanting my ass on a platter. You guessed it, spark bolts no fit. I swapped him the 403 Olds plugs for the Pontiac plugs and as he was stalking out informed him (sweetly) that his car had a 403 Olds. He started screaming, nearly foaming at the mouth, the store owner and manager both came running over and escorted him out the door.

Yeah, the former owner of one of my T/A's was "that guy". After I bought it, I took it over to a local speed shop, and as I pulled in, I saw the parts guy start to duck out of the window, like he was trying to hide. To his surprise, I walked in instead of the numbskull former owner. He then explained to me the sins he committed on the car. He bought headers for a Pontiac 400 and tried to make them fit the Olds 403 in the car. He also bought a Performer RPM intake for a Pontiac and tried to do the same thing. He told me about all the crap the guy tried to do with the car over the past year or so, and that pretty much gave me a list of things to start fixing on the car.

Yeah, the dumbass actually broke all the exhaust manifold bolts off in the head except for two on each side when he tried to make those headers fit too. I had to pull the heads and have the bolts extracted and the holes heli-coiled because of that. Also, he took the old intake and Quadrajet that were set up to work with the shaker setup and tossed them out. I still maintain that if I ever see the former owner again, I will punch him square in the face for the atrocities he committed under his ownership.

Back to your regularly scheduled parts store stories...

there was also the time when i walked up on another dumpster diver scrounging for scrap in the dumpter he was standing on the top edge of the dumpster, evidently he hadnt heard me come up with the insanely loud cart we used to carry the trash out with. i calmly asked him what he was doing he freaks out and falls into the dumpster head first and begins calling me every name in the book and threatening violence, having dealt with him before( another thief errr. regular) i explained to him that we would not tolerate him going through the trash anymore and that really set him off, i toss the trash in the dumpster not anywhere near he was and walk away. as i walk in the back door he trys to get out slips and falls in the dumpster again.

that was a good day

In reply to 3brokenhondas:

LOL!!!

silverfleet if your ever in cincinnati we need to sit down and have a beer.

The autoparts store i work for now is pretty good (Smyth) and tends to have better quality countermen than ive dealt with in the past.

ill let a few more stories fly as i remember them.

P.S. anyone in the area who needs parts come up to the store on cincinnati columbus rd. you will get the grm discount

In reply to 3brokenhondas:

I'll be at the Challenge this year. If you go, it will be beer time!

I have worked in every genre of automotobilia since 1986. Technical school in 1986, GM dealership apprenticeship starting in 1987, tire stores, general mechanical, body shop estimating, parts counter, service writing, shop management, parts management... The stories are too numerous to tell.

There is an extremely disturbing trend that you will be seeing soon: The people running your local dealerships are starting to look at the Autozone method of selling parts. Cheaping out on labor and selling useless add ons as a priority over offering proper customer service.

Look forward to the automotive equivalent of Idiocracy coming to a dealer near you.

^^ 'Idiocracy' is already here. There are two pricing structures in many dealerships: 'matrix' pricing for parts use in the shop and MSRP for parts sold across the counter. Scenario: customer gets an estimate for work in the shop, decides to do it himself and buys the parts across the counter, finds out they are cheaper. The service advisor is now considered a complete sumbitch.

I have experienced this first hand.

these tales are great keep em coming..

Ok, here's another one:

We had a regular, let's call him Moustache. He was a young guy, but looked like he crawled out of a time machine from 1983. He would regularly have domestic disputes with whatever gutter trash female that was with him. He had a big black moustache, and used to tell tall tales. He came in one time, and I can't remember how he got all fired up, but he challenged me to race my T/A with his "muscle car".

In his words, it was a "1976 GTO SS" with a "raised small block" and a "42-inch rear end", and it ran the quarter mile in the 10's. I have no idea what what the Berkley a raised small block or a 42'' rear end is, but I told him to bring it by. Sadly, he never did.

We had a series of Tall Tale Tellers (or Triple T's as we used to call them) that would tell us all sorts of hilarious stories. I'll have to remember some more.

My local CSK was great. Then the O'reillys got in there. Everyone of the employees who had been there for at least 6 years were gone. Everybody I knew - gone. Try the twit at the counter. "That isn't a wearable item so we don't list any replacements." Odd, mine was worn out - going back to NAPA in the morning.

I hate working the counter and assuming somebodies an idiot only to be surprised that they have a clue what they are talking about. Then I feel like an idiot. When you "correct" a customer on the engine choice for that make and model only to find out they were right not stupid and had done an engine swap. I do tend not to argue but just state that the engine they have chosen wasn't an option that year and wait for their response. If they know their stuff they will inform you about the swap at that point in time. If not - well . . .

John Brown wrote: There is an extremely disturbing trend that you will be seeing soon: The people running your local dealerships are starting to look at the Autozone method of selling parts. Cheaping out on labor and selling useless add ons as a priority over offering proper customer service.

2 years ago when I worked as a Lube Munkee , err... I mean Tech at the local Toyota dealership we were required to bring the cabin filter from all the cars we serviced to the Service Advisor. They were then to upsell the customer.

I always felt bad for them, they had to try to convince the customer who came in with a coupon for a $29.95 oil change to spend another $40 on a dealer only item that most people didn't care about. The owners even had a monthly contest to see who could sell the most.

Though I do admit there were a few filters that were pretty damn nasty.

We had a customer threaten violence against a salesman at a jewelry store I worked at. He was told to come on in. When the customer got there he was promptly arrested by the off duty cop that worked security. Ah the joys of decent store security and paranoid bosses that record phone conversations. The "customer" was sentenced to anger management courses and tresspassed from the mall.

I had another guy actually take a swing at me when I told him how much a battery would be for his watch. Next thing I know security is pulling me off him. It was interesting as I didnt have a mark anywhere but my right hand. Video clearly showed him taking the first swing. Tresspass warrent issued.

Moral is you get lousy customers any time you work with the pubic.

16vCorey wrote: That reminds me, one time I went into an AZ to get a few things. I bought one of those little $.99 packets of Loctite (because I use it so infrequently the bottles usually leak out or dry up before I get to use it twice). For some reason it only rang up for a penny. I didn't even notice, so the counter guy brings it to my attention and asked if I'd like any more, so I bought every packet they had on the counter! I'm still using my little packets of Loctite years later!

I stopped at the local Auto Zone one time to buy a car magazine (Rod and Custom, if I remember correctly.) The woman behind the counter scanned it, and it came up on the register as $0.01. I told her there must be something wrong and I'd pay the correct price, but she just pointed at the register without saying a word. I gave her a penny and left.

In the late '80's I was working the service drive one evening, my three co workers were off doing their thing and I was talking to a customer on the phone. A guy walks out of the cashiers office, looks at me, I make eye contact and nod to him to say 'I see you and will help you as soon as I am able' (BIG thing for good customer relations/service).

The phone conversation went on longer than I expected; suddenly there is a hand on the back of my neck and another pulling the phone from my ear. It's the guy who had walked out of the cashiers' office. He slams the phone down and says 'I had to go get my own berkeleying car' then he stalks off. Me, I am speechless. Lucky for me, two of the techs saw the whole thing and told the service manager.

About two weeks later he drives back in and comes to MY desk. I tell him 'sir I believe you might want to work with one of the other service advisors (unspoken: because there is a very good chance I will punch you in the throat)'. He storms off and finds the service manager who then comes to my desk to ask just what the hell is going on. By this time, one of the techs who had seen the earlier incident was there and we both reminded him of what had happened. He turns to the guy and says 'Yes sir, I believe you would be better off with one of the other service advisors.' The guy starts going off, the SM says 'Or maybe this fellow here could call the police and file assault charges'. That shut him right up and he walked away.

My local NAPA is one of the machine shop stores and they know their stuff, our Advance is pretty good too, both have enthusiast staff who have modded Mustangs, Trans Ams and more.

These guys know how to go above and beyond, I am spoiled.

The Advance store one county north is useless, average age of the staff would be 18 and they can't find anything that is not in the puter

Try being 16 and getting parts for anything.

My favorite:

Me: I need a 12v 50A universal relay, a 20A fuse, and a fuse holder.

Parts Guy: What's the relay for?

Me: I'm wiring a fuel pump.

Yeah, but what kind of car?

It doesn't matter, I just need the relay and fuse.

No, sir, I can't sell you a relay unless you tell me what kind of car it is.

I want a plain universal relay. Where are they, I'll look for it.

There's no need for that sir. What's the make and model of your car?

Ok, fine. It's a 1959 Berkley microcar with a Suzuki GSX-R motor in it, and a full tube frame. The relay I'm looking for goes to the motorcycle fuel pump in the tank we welded. (I always use this car when they ask me what kind of car, and I'm buying a universal part. Never fails to elicit blank stares.)

Blank stare.

So, do you have it in stock, or do you have to order it?

Um, I'm really sorry, but we don't carry that part sir.

Oh man, that's too bad. You don't have any universal relays, do you? Maybe like a 12 volt 50 amp one?

You know what, we actually do! Great idea! They're on isle 5...

Or when the generator went out on the Ranchero, before it got the alternator.

How can I help you?

I need a generator for a 1963 Ranchero.

No sir, you mean an alternator.

No, I want a generator.

There's no such thing, it's called an alternator.

Yes there is, It's like an alternator, but it produces direct current instead of alternating current.

I'm sorry sir, it says we don't have alternators for that car, anyway.

We walked out...

My father went into NAPA one day to get the price for a 6 volt generator for his 56 Ford tractor. Parts guy said "how bout that, I just converted mine to 12 volts and I will sell you all the nesesary parts for less than the rebuilt generator. Give me 5 minutes to get the stuff." SOLD.

Interesting thing is even though he changed from positive ground to negative ground he didnt have to reverse the polarity on the starter. I cant get my head around why.

Tommy Suddard wrote: Or when the generator went out on the Ranchero, before it got the alternator. How can I help you? I need a generator for a 1963 Ranchero. No sir, you mean an alternator. No, I want a generator. There's no such thing, it's called an alternator. Yes there is, It's like an alternator, but it produces direct current instead of alternating current. I'm sorry sir, it says we don't have alternators for that car, anyway. We walked out...

He was right, you wanted an alternator.

Not related to the parts store, but related to stupid people...

A friend of mine worked at a photo lab. One day while helping a customer fill out the envelope he dropped the roll of film and joked "Uh oh, now the pictures may be blurry"

Well apparently this lady had no idea how to focus a camera this was in the early 90's and a few hours later when she came back to get her prints she found that they were all blurry. Well she went off on my friend and got the manager involved. She told the manager how my friend dropped the film and that's why the pics are blurry...

Eventually got out of paying for the processing, got free film and got a coupon for free processing...