Never get in a boat, or submersible, with a guy nicknamed Mr. Titanic.
Never get in a boat, or submersible, with a guy nicknamed Mr. Titanic.
"The French, they hadn't had anything to do with tanks for four or five years, except German ones coming around, telling them what to do." - David Fletcher
"Im in a Bobbitt kind of mood today."
Tracy, our office manager this morning.
In reply to Dusterbd13-michael :
Wait... as in Lorena Bobbitt???
In reply to SV reX :
How many other Bobbitts could she be referring to?
That's the Bobbitt!
I got right back in the truck.
I invented the term "prison grip." Or at least I think I did.
"It just up and daaahhhd" - A non-enthusiast acquaintance of mine explaining how their car's engine stopped functioning (e.g. died) at a light.
A quick consultation makes me think it's the timing belt.
D: is that the guy from the band Harleigh likes, you got her the shirt at the show for?
Me: no, different guy
D: there's more than one?
Me: yes dear, there's an entire genre of country rappers, and they all look either just like me or me if I had a meth habit
D: who listens to this that there needs to be more than one?
Me: hi, have you met me?
In reply to RevRico :
Was it Jelly Roll?
In reply to Mndsm :
Big Smo, I never got into jellyroll really, especially now that he's gone Nashville.
"It may be an unwise man that doesn't learn from his own mistakes, but it's an absolute idiot that doesn't learn from other people's." - Dr. Frasier Crane.
"Of all the threads Ive posted in, this is one of them" - Me
"I couldn't help but notice the design of them [DIY coffee grinders used in supermarkets] made it unlikely that a person would check for a head of garlic before grinding their beans"
Me: I love telling dad jokes.
Friend: Does he laugh? *finger guns*
"If you see a cloud of dust up ahead, there's probably a car in it" Keith Tanner at FM's Summer Camp driver's meeting several years ago.
Guy I race with hopping in an unfamiliar car for a rallycross fun-run: "Hey, how do I turn the traction control off?"
Me: "Brother, this is the '90s. What's traction control?"
My friend Lawrence: "There isn't even a dashboard in that thing. Do you think it has traction control?"
"Get this straight once and for all: when the S is added to a word simply to make it a plural, no apostrophe is used (except in expressions where letters or numerals are treated like words, like “mind your P’s and Q’s” and “learn your ABC’s”)."
I don't even do that! Nothing wrong with Ps and Qs.
It's only Jazz if it comes from New Orleans.
Everything else is just sparkling blues.
all relationships end in heartache
"Can't even find a crackhead to watch my car in this town. Arkansas sucks."
You haven't experienced love/hate like I have until you hear wwwbbbBBBRRRRAAAAAHHHHHHHBHHEY-E-YEAH YEAH YEAH! HEY-E-YA-E-YA... of an obnoxious Harley blaring "What's Up" by 4 non-Blonds out of eight 6x9 speakers on top of the already awful exhaust. - Appleseed
In reply to RevRico :
And now Smo is quite Smoll
Folk is just jazz for white people
You'll need to log in to post.
