It concerns me that people judge my character based upon my weight.
Not sure if that's my problem or theirs.
It concerns me that people judge my character based upon my weight.
Not sure if that's my problem or theirs.
It's sort of unavoidable though. Certain professions are going to be judged based on how the person looks. Personal trainer needs to be fit, chef should be heavy. Worked with a cardiologist one who weighed 400 lbs and smoked. I could see the disbelief in people's faces when he would lecture them about lifestyle choice they needed to make when clearly he wasn't following his own advice.
Would you trust a mechanic who didn't have grease under his nails?
That said, you know who you are, and the people who love you, know who you are. berkeley the rest of them. Why associate with shallow shiny happy people?
mad_machine wrote: I once went to a dentist who had dirty teeth... never went back
There are two barbers in town. One has an immaculate haircut and one looks like it was done with hedge clippers. Who do you go to?
Appleseed wrote: Would you trust a mechanic who didn't have grease under his nails?
Hey I work very hard to keep my girlfriends clean.
Knurled wrote:mad_machine wrote: I once went to a dentist who had dirty teeth... never went backThere are two barbers in town. One has an immaculate haircut and one looks like it was done with hedge clippers. Who do you go to?
The one with the hedge clipper hair cut. Because obviously they cut each other's hair
In reply to Keith Tanner:
One tries to cut his own hair. The other is successful....
Or one has his done by the other guy in town, and the other goes out of town for his.
Maybe you should have yours cut by the wife of the barber with immaculate hair.
To the OP, if a girl is chunky and unattractive, she "has a great personality."
If a guy is likewise, he's a man of fine solid character. Are you too skinny to contain any moral fiber? Anyone who pre-judges based on appearance alone is not someone whose character is worth concerning yourself with. If you don't value their character, why give any weight to their opinion of yours?
I'd love to say weigh doesn't matter, but how often do you see CEO's, CFO's, senior management etc who are fat and scruffy? It happens, but not often and if perceptions didn't matter 1/3 of captains of industry would be obese, not a bit chunky but obese like the rest of the population.
so yes, perception matters I'd say.
Adrian_Thompson wrote: I'd love to say weigh doesn't matter, but how often do you see CEO's, CFO's, senior management etc who are fat and scruffy? It happens, but not often and if perceptions didn't matter 1/3 of captains of industry would be obese, not a bit chunky but obese like the rest of the population. so yes, perception matters I'd say.
My dad is in upper level management at a small-medium sized company and I can say 100% for a fact that he will judge people based upon weight and general level of fitness, as he and I have discussed this numerous times. He's not a marathon runner or Iron Man competitor or anything crazy like that, but he is quite active and in pretty excellent shape for a 55 year old.
Personally, I think it is an incredibly shallow means of judging an individual's merit in regards to a job that has little or no physical requirements. But right, wrong, or indifferent it absolutely happens.
I'd think prospective employers definitely judge one's physical condition. First from a health perspective, is this person in for the long run or sick leave waiting to happen?
Next, and may be career specific but do they have discipline to take care of themselves and go an extra mile if needed.
Dunno if that matters tho. At least around here all the nurses and office staff is as round as are tall. Health facility, huh.
I want to be in good shape and nice to look at so my wife stays in nice shape and is a good to look at.
I also want to be faster and better on the bike (mtb), which means being in better shape.
At the office I want to more energy and attack the day's challenges.
Never really worried too much about how people view me otherwise. I'm kind of a dopey dude with bad hair and scraggly beard.
PHeller wrote: Never really worried too much about how people view me otherwise. I'm kind of a dopey dude with bad hair and scraggly beard.
Hey, I know a guy like that (checks mirror.)
Im in an industry filled with fat guys in poorly fitted polos sporting 80s mustaches so its easy to be fashionable.
I just got back from a conference and even saw dudes in pleated jeans.
fasted58 wrote: I'd think prospective employers definitely judge one's physical condition. First from a health perspective, is this person in for the long run or sick leave waiting to happen? Next, and may be career specific but do they have discipline to take care of themselves and go an extra mile if needed. Dunno if that matters tho. At least around here all the nurses and office staff is as round as are tall. Health facility, huh.
This. Its not politically correct, but its true- particularly the discipline portion. It hard as hell for me to stay in the shape I'm in, and that shape is too damn round.
Thanks for the honest responses. So I guess it is true - I must be slovenly and undisciplined, unworthy of trust and responsibility.
What's amazing is the extreme decline in my character since I started taking a medication that caused my weight gain. I had no idea that adding 40 pounds could make me an ignorant slob. They should put that on the warning label: "may cause disrespect and societal scorn".
I'm sure appearance played a part in my last interview at work. The interviews are more like oral quizzes where they ask five questions and see how many of the all important buzzwords you spit back at them. I went on the first day. It was my day off, I got there early, made sure the suit looked good, had time to relax ect. Got to work the next day and heard how well they'd heard I did. Then HR found out someone leaked the questions so they wanted to start over. I had to get changed, rush from Manhattan to Brooklyn, and when I got there jog a few blocks and up to the third floor in one hour. Being fat and in a suit and tie in August I arrived a mess. I felt I did just as well answering the questions but did not make the list. The only thing that changed was how I looked at the interview.
Some of this is just part of being human. Across pretty much all societies (with a few notable exceptions) we view people who are fit and strong as people in charge and in power.
This is why people are most bothered by police/firefighters/military that are visibly out of shape. You have someone who is wearing a uniform that is a symbol of respect and power but the person inside doesn't convey that same feeling. It makes us uncomfortable.
You're unlikely to find a fit well groomed well spoken 25 year old of either sex working in a menial job for long either. Unless they're in an industry saturated by that type (clubs in a city) they get moved up the ladder quickly. People get uncomfortable with that disconnect as well.
It's not right, and I'm not defending it, but most people aren't even conscious that they're doing it.
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