She wants a wedding in a church, I want a wedding on the beach, possible loophole? FL Folks chime in

I'm getting married this upcoming fall and SWMBO wants a wedding in a church. Though not my first choice, it's her day and I'm perfectly fine with letting her do what she wants. The issue is finding a place that looks nice and doesn't cost $2,500. That's when I thought of a possible loophole. What if I found a place/the remnants of an old, no longer used church. I'm thinking one of these old state parks has to have the remains of an old Catholic church somewhere on their grounds. Any ideas/ suggestions?

You can find some pretty neat churches in old rural mountain towns. Just search google for your area + historic church and look for one with a very small parish.

Have you asked her what she would think about that?

You say you are fine with letting her do what she wants, but loking for loopholes kind of implies that you are not 100% ok with it.

PHeller wrote: You can find some pretty neat churches in old rural mountain towns. Just search google for your area + historic church and look for one with a very small parish.

That's pretty much what my wife and I did. We both wanted a church wedding, but had a problem that we wanted a really small wedding and went to a big church. So we spotted a pretty little country church out on a drive and asked them if we could have the wedding there. They did want a small fee for this (and were a bit surprised as they didn't get that request very often), but it was nowhere near $2500.

If she is a member of a church, they shouldn't be charging her. If she isn't, why should she care whether she is married in a church or not. Oh, wait a minute, we are talking about a woman.

If you think that is expensive, wait till you tell the caterer and florist the W word.

how bout a place like this? http://ucctampa.org/about-u/pictures/pictures-of-our-church/

http://www.andrewsmemorialchapel.com/

Memorial Chapel is a good search term. Typically means that it doesn't have a parish anymore.

EastCoastMojo wrote: Have you asked her what she would think about that? You say you are fine with letting her do what she wants, but loking for loopholes kind of implies that you are not 100% ok with it.

What she said. And that's not a good recipe.

foxtrapper wrote:

EastCoastMojo wrote: Have you asked her what she would think about that? You say you are fine with letting her do what she wants, but loking for loopholes kind of implies that you are not 100% ok with it.

What she said. And that's not a good recipe.

She was open to the idea. It's not that I'm not OK with it, just might as well try to find something that suits us both is possible.

spitfirebill wrote: If she is a member of a church, they shouldn't be charging her. If she isn't, why should she care whether she is married in a church or not. Oh, wait a minute, we are talking about a woman. If you think that is expensive, wait till you tell the caterer and florist the W word.

She's Catholic, but it wouldn't be in the Catholic church that she normally goes to. It'll still be a Catholic church though. From what I've found they normally have X price for parishioners and y price for non parishioners.

Enyar wrote:

spitfirebill wrote: If she is a member of a church, they shouldn't be charging her. If she isn't, why should she care whether she is married in a church or not. Oh, wait a minute, we are talking about a woman. If you think that is expensive, wait till you tell the caterer and florist the W word.

She's Catholic, but it wouldn't be in the Catholic church that she normally goes to. It'll still be a Catholic church though. From what I've found they normally have X price for parishioners and y price for non parishioners.

I have heard this about the Catholics. One of my former co-workers wanted to send his kids through Catholic school. He would tell us what all they told him he was going to have to do to get them in.

In reply to Enyar:

HA!

I just think its cute that you think you actually have any say/opinion on your wedding.

I say this as a married man welcoming a fellow brother into the fold: you are a wedding accessory on par with the cake or the flowers, but not necessarily the dress.

Ojala wrote: In reply to Enyar: HA! I just think its cute that you think you actually have any say/opinion on your wedding. I say this as a married man welcoming a fellow brother into the fold: you are a wedding accessory on par with the cake or the flowers, but not necessarily the dress.

I am quickly figuring this out.

Note to others: never say "just do what you have to do and let's get this thing over with" to SWMBO.

You all married some powerful women. My lady would be perfectly happy if everyone else just planned her wedding for her. Her only requirements are, outdoors, fun, relaxed.

It's actually me who wants the more traditional stuff.

Go for no church, but a nude beach.

Here is a Catholic church on the beach in Annotto Bay, St. Mary, Jamaica.

We got married last summer on Edisto beach SC because SWMBO-MBO I had little say in the location. It was not expensive as the town charges a small permitting fee ($10-20) for the ceremony. It sounds like you are tied to either an actual church or a church type location that is also on the beach. We rented a house to have the reception and stayed a week as our Honeymoon it worked out really well.

Is Gainesville too far? UF's Baughman Center is quite nice looking, and fit for a small ceremony.

http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baughman_Center

$2500??? What kind of Catholic Church is that? I got married in a Catholic Church and don't remember paying (they actually call it "donation") more than $400. If I remember correctly it was $200 10 years ago.

Slippery wrote: $2500??? What kind of Catholic Church is that? I got married in a Catholic Church and don't remember paying (they actually call it "donation") more than $400. If I remember correctly it was $200 10 years ago.

Were/are you, your wife, or any parents of you or your wife members of the parish?

mtn wrote:

Slippery wrote: $2500??? What kind of Catholic Church is that? I got married in a Catholic Church and don't remember paying (they actually call it "donation") more than $400. If I remember correctly it was $200 10 years ago.

Were/are you, your wife, or any parents of you or your wife members of the parish?

Yes, we were. But still don't think it could be that much more if you are not a member, or could it?

Slippery wrote:

mtn wrote:

Slippery wrote: $2500??? What kind of Catholic Church is that? I got married in a Catholic Church and don't remember paying (they actually call it "donation") more than $400. If I remember correctly it was $200 10 years ago.

Were/are you, your wife, or any parents of you or your wife members of the parish?

Yes, we were. But still don't think it could be that much more if you are not a member, or could it?

It often times is. I think the reasoning behind it is that if they didn't, then everyone would want to get married at Notre Dame or Cathedral Basilica of Saint Louis or Holy Name Cathedral. Aside from this, if you regularly attend mass at a particular church, you probably also regularly donate to that parish.

There's a Catholic Church on the beach down in Mexico called nuestra señora del Carmen in playa del Carmen. Google also says there's one in Mexico beach, fl.

The obvious answer is to become a member of the church you want to get married in. You are probably going to have to do some pre-marriage counseling with a priest anyway, do it at the church where you want to do the ceremony. Both times I got married we did that with Lutheran churches.

From personal experience, me on my second wife and she on her third husband, all you are going to remember from that day is each other anyway. Do the service somewhere small and fill it up with the people you both love, have the reception somewhere casual and safe for anyone drinking, take lots of pictures, and try to remember that everyone there is there to get the two of you off to the best start possible. An easy wedding is a hard wedding to mess up, ensuring minimum drama and maximum of all the best parts.

Welcome to Aruba honey...

Personally... I'd do it in the gold mine ruins though. The view is better.

oldopelguy wrote: The obvious answer is to become a member of the church you want to get married in. You are probably going to have to do some pre-marriage counseling with a priest anyway, do it at the church where you want to do the ceremony. Both times I got married we did that with Lutheran churches. From personal experience, me on my second wife and she on her third husband, all you are going to remember from that day is each other anyway. Do the service somewhere small and fill it up with the people you both love, have the reception somewhere casual and safe for anyone drinking, take lots of pictures, and try to remember that everyone there is there to get the two of you off to the best start possible. An easy wedding is a hard wedding to mess up, ensuring minimum drama and maximum of all the best parts.

That does seem like the way to go, but most of the churches we've found require you to be a parishioner for 6 months and then you have to wait another 6 months after that to get married.

Loophole:

http://www.churchs.com/