Stress related sleep loss

I am having an infrequent problem, about once a month my mind goes nuts thinking and I cannot switch it off.

This is a problem I have had all my life as far as I can recall.

It isn't at all regular but every now and then, especially when I have an early start, I just cannot switch off.

Prompted by tonight's complete loss of sleep.

Any advice, is this common, is it a sign of something else?

Posted for the hive's remarkable response rate.

I have had that issue. I remember one specific time 12 years ago I couldn't get to sleep because I couldn't remember the difference between a sociopath and a psychopath.

FYI a sociopath has a sense of right and wrong, but it exist independent of social norms. A psychopath knows right and wrong and doesn't care.

It has been quite a while since I have had the issue. As I entered my mid 30's I had a real issue with insomnia. Before I started on the drugs, I wanted some better ideas. I posted on here and got some good input. I will give you these and take them or leave them.

1st - First from Dr Hess; TVs don't belong in the bedroom. So many people fall asleep with it on and wonder why they sleep poorly. It's lights and colors and brain stimulation. Get rid of it. Same for the iPhone, iPad or laptop.

2nd - Watch your caffeine intake. I used to drink a cup of coffee then take a nap. No more. In fact, if I want to sleep at a reasonable hour, I can't have any caffeine after 2. That includes a coke with dinner. Also watch your volume. I get two a day, three in extreme cases (I have to be up early, had to stay up late, at a racetrack, etc). This also applies if you use tobacco. Nicotine is a stimulant.

3rd - Exercise. Find something that exhausts your body. Running swimming, biking crossfit, lifting, do something. and do it. If you have every had a dog or a child, you know they behave better when they get a little exercise and the blood pumping. I would submit your brain isn't much different. I can tell how well I sleep when I run vs days I don't. Having a physical job is not the same thing. I ain't saying it ain't hard, I am just suggesting the brain sees it differently.

4th. - Your bed should exist for only 2 activities. One of them is sleeping. Humans are creatures of habit and you need establish your bed as a sleeping zone. Not eating, watching TV, or anything else other than the other thing. By doing so, you set up a behavior where your brain recognizes cues when you go to bed and starts to wind down.

5th - Don't be afraid to spend some coin on a comfy mattress. If your brain is up, it might be responding to body stimuli, because you aren't comfortable.

This will not work immediately, you are training your body and your brain. It takes some commitment. The wife and I have had some terse discussions about her iPad in bed after I am asleep. The lights and motion do affect me.

I am also not a doctor, this is what I researched and what worked for me. Dr Hess is actually a Dr, and knows quite a bit about the brain. I hope he weighs in here.

I'm no doctor, but I've always figured that anything that doesn't hurt all the time can't be too big of a deal.

I have the same thing you're describing from time to time. For whatever reason, after getting home from work, having dinner, cleaning up, playing with the kids, and putting the kids to bed, some nights I'm just totally spent and just want to basically sit on the couch like a lump. Then, right as I hit the threshold of needing to go to bed so I can get up the next morning, my motivation comes back like a tidal wave and I manage to suddenly remind myself about every big and little thing that I've been meaning to do. All the way from "put that roll of toilet paper on the holder instead of just letting it sit on top of the old empty roll" to "be a better person" and everything in between, it seems. Then I lie awake for an hour or two staring at the clock with my brain wanting to leap from bed and conquer the world and my body just saying "meh, tired". I don't think I've ever had a panic attack, but it certainly feels like a mini-version of what I envision a panic attack would be like. The problem seems exponentially worse if I try to sleep in total silence, so we keep the ceiling fan on for some white noise.

I've also found that as I get older, booze does weird things to me. Used to be that I'd have a few, get sleepy, have a good night's sleep. Recently, though, any more than a couple beers and I'll go to sleep pretty easy, but then wake up after about 3 or 4 hours of sleep and be completely wide awake.

A couple years back, I totally kicked caffeine out of my life. For about 7 days, I was very much in hell (as was pretty much everyone around me...) After the withdrawal, though, I slept much better. Wasn't worth it though. :)

So, I guess, you're not alone. That's gotta be good news, right?

After some advice on here about a month ago, I started trying melatonin. It definitely has a positive impact, though it doesn't switch me off light a light. I don't take it on weekends.

I'd cut out all caffeine after noon years ago, and we bought a Tempurpedic several years ago as well. They both helped a tiny bit, but not a great deal.

In the end, I think either my body just doesn't want to be on a 24-hour schedule, or I need to sleep in shorter, more frequent intervals.

Every once in a while, I have the same problem. Rather than lay there I get up and go do something. Tuesday night it was a 2 mile walk at 1:00am,

Sometimes I go out to the shop, or read a book. If I just lay there I will never get to sleep.

What others have said about sleep tips.

Since your sleep problem is stress related what can you do to alleviate the stress?

Talk it out or work it out well before sleep time. Some issues can't be resolved as quickly as we'd like, learn to accept patience.

Patience is my new attitude. I used to suffer anxiety and toss and turn over projects not getting done before winter. Now I say if it gets done it gets done. If it's beyond my control, go w/ the flow.

When I'm really stressed (and that will happen working seven days a week) I think patience is just a lie I tell myself. When all else fails I say 'berkeley it'... and I hafta be good w/ that.

What mental said, to a T.

I have it too. Last night, I was laying awake in bed at 11:00PM (after waking up at 5:30AM), thinking about my 5:15AM alarm this morning, the late bed time I have tonight and tomorrow night, the 6:00AM wake up on Sunday, and the 3 hour drive Sunday night. Obviously, I should have been asleep. But that wasn't happening, even after a full day at work and 9 holes of golf. So I read a book for an hour until I started to feel sleepy.

Try one of those sound machines that make noises like waves on the shore.

I go through these spells periodically. It was worse when the kids were younger and at home, or when there was stress at work. I had to think about something not work related.

I'll sleep when I'm dead.

Sex is a great stress reliever. Get busy with the wife right before you turn in and you'll enjoy a good night's sleep.

1988RedT2 wrote: Sex is a great stress reliever. Get busy with the wife right before you turn in and you'll enjoy a good night's sleep.

Plus, there is a hormone released after the O face happens that makes you sleepy.

Meds are inconsistent for me in this regard. What seems to help me the most is reading a book for 45 minutes to an hour before going to sleep. It helps get the mind "sorted" and "slowed down" enough that I can sleep. Don't know if you're a reader or not, but if you are it might be worth a try. For me it has to be a book (in paper form), reading something from a screen doesn't cut it and I am not sure why.

I'm on loads of depressants, but still can't fall asleep sometimes. Very infrequent. Sometimes there is not much to be done.

Hello, my name is Pinchvalve, and I am an insomniac. (Hello Pinch) It started years ago when climbing the corporate ladder and getting divorced, I had trouble shutting down at night. It led to a complete lack of ability to get tired at night and progressed to physical problems and eventually an absence of sleep altogether. Drugs can put you to sleep, but they are not a permanent solution. After MUCH research, trial and error and work, I can offer you one piece of advice for your situation.

Your mind is racing because something is unresolved. You probably won't resolve it that evening, so you lie awake. The best thing to do is resolve SOMETHING to put your mind at rest. Make a list of things that you can do to try to solve it, or print out something that you are going to read the next day about it, or break it into smaller problems and solve one easy one before bed. Once you can convince your mind that you have a handle on it, or even just a workable plan, your mind can relax and forget about it and let you sleep.

What Mental and spitfirebill said. All of our friends are amazed at how well all of our kids sleep and there is a sound machine in all of the bedrooms and not a single TV.

For me, my sleep on-switch is the sound of the ocean. If Im actually at the ocean, I cannot sit down, or I will be out in minutes.

I have a 10 minute long MP3 I bought online of just simply the waves at night, no marimba music or seagulls, just waves. If I cant sleep, I start a playlist with that MP3 in it 3 times, and Im out before its over. Works every time.

Another one that works for me is to imagine performing a manual process. Maybe its changing the brake rotors on your DD, or (for me) disasembling and reinstalling a component set on a bicycle (BMX 3piece cranks are a perfect item). Imagine manipulating the tools, inserting the bolts, holding the parts. If you can think of a process that you know backwards and forwards, and imagine starting and working towards completion, Im often out before I get 3/4 thru.

Rusted_Busted_Spit wrote: What Mental and spitfirebill said. All of our friends are amazed at how well all of our kids sleep and there is a sound machine in all of the bedrooms and not a single TV.

It works well for my grandson.

I use an oscillating fan aimed to sweep above the bed for white noise when we don't have the window ac until on. Works well for me.

I also have a few quiet, quick projects that I keep ready to go that I can just get up and go do, things like a spare carb or starter to rebuild or aluminum oil pan or valve cover to polish. Finishing something goes a long way to setting my mind more to right and letting me move on to sleep.

You may also want to consider a sleep study to learn more about how you sleep. I did one in college and learned that I slip in and out of REM sleep with about a 90 minute cycle. That means when I am sleeping I am closest to being awake every 90 minutes and that is the best time for me to wake up. So for me 4.5 hours is considerably more restful than 5.5 would be. This lets me set my alarm better and has really changed the way I sleep.

I had that happen with me during my divorce and when I found out my dad had cancer, there were some nights I just could not sleep. I'd doze off for an hour or two, then my brain would start running in circles and I'd wake up. It didn't help that I was temporarily locked into a job I wound up detesting.

Laying there trying to go back to sleep just did not work. I'd get up and go find something to do, read some, clean the kitchen (really! that's cathartic at 3AM) stuff like that. If it was a work night I'd typically start getting sleepy around 5:45 which is when I need to get up so I'd just stay up and go on to work.

This went on for a few months, as the stress builders started dropping off my sleep got better and now I'm back to abnormal. So yeah I vote either 1) remove the stress or 2) if you can't remove it now then remember 'this too shall pass' and keep plugging along.

I would not recommend sleep aids, they are no substitute for the real thing. My brother felt tired all the time, he drank a lot and would use over the counter sleep meds. He finally went to the doc who told him his problem was he was not really sleeping, rather he was passing out and there's a big difference. He backed off the booze and dropped the meds entirely, he's a new man.

Have you tried beati...... Ah never mind. You're a guy, of course you have

I had that issue my whole life; I don't know what changed except my work location but I absolutely don't have it anymore. Mine was more like 4 nights a week wouldn't be able to sleep till 4am and I get up at 4:30 so that didn't work well at all.

Wish I could help you on this but what mental said is probably the best advice.