Taking the dive - deposit on engagement ring

Yeah, her being involved was great...there are SO many options, overwhelming, really. 

Plus, she's a florist, owns her own shop here in Winston Salem, NC, so she's working with her hands all the time. I didnt think about it (never have on this), but ring style is big so that it doesnt snag on things and, worst case scenario, lose the ring or a stone.

We looked several places together and this was somehting she found online (at a local place) that specializes in estate/used pieces. It's an antique ring, she loves the color of the stone, it's a 'low setting' or whatever. She's into it. 

And, for me, it's nice it's a few hundred less than the other two that she had narrowed it down to. But she kept going back to this one and so I put that downpayment on it and today I'll pay the rest...big purchase!

I don't believe in women picking out their own rings, but I'm old fashioned.

My wife loses crap all the time. I bought her diamond earrings several years ago. She currently has A earring.

Also, while marriage hasn't been awful I wouldn't recommend it unless you want to have kids. And if you use the term SWMBO we can't be friends.

Congrats.

IMO, don't worry too much about the house thing.  You two can decide as a team later what the ideal house is and go get/build that.  Houses aren't that expensive around here.  Maybe at that point I'll sell you mine :)

RX Reven' said:

Exactly, I'd far rather be shopping at a BB&B than watching some lame a$$ sports ball thing.

Ouch.  I can't think of two worse things to choose between.

ddavidv said:

I don't believe in women picking out their own rings, but I'm old fashioned.

My wife loses crap all the time. I bought her diamond earrings several years ago. She currently has A earring.

Also, while marriage hasn't been awful I wouldn't recommend it unless you want to have kids. And if you use the term SWMBO we can't be friends.

With my (now ex) wife, I just payed attention to her likes.  Problem was, she wasn't into jewelry or gems, so I even faked an interest in watches and necklaces so we had excuses to go into jewelry stores and I would ask her which stones she liked.  Bingo.  Marquis cut, and she was a fan of quality over quantity.  When it was time to buy the ring, I just went to a trusted jeweler and had it made.  3/4 ct and I got a band with channel-set stones equalling another 1/2 ct.  That's what I could afford and she loved it.  She didn't want some huge rock getting in the way of her tom-boy hobbies.

She actually gave it back to me when we divorced (and I gave her my band) which I thought was unnecessary, but classy.

It's now in my gunsafe until next week.

WOW

Congratulations! 

As my wife was keen to point out before we were wed. If you love it than you better put a ring on it.

Doing so, in my case, was one of the best decisions in my life. 

I had no money. But I had skills (women love skills.) Steampunk is the catalyst that got us talking in the first place. So i made her a ring.  Copper wire, crystal clear epoxy, and the guts of a dead wind up watch. She still revels in the fact that it's the only one in the world.

In reply to Appleseed :

Nicely original. The number of jewels in the watch movement still count as well. They're rubies albeit tiny.

Appleseed said:

I had no money. But I had skills (women love skills.) Steampunk is the catalyst that got us talking in the first place. So i made her a ring.  Copper wire, crystal clear epoxy, and the guts of a dead wind up watch. She still revels in the fact that it's the only one in the world.

That's cool!

16 years in and the wife wants her diamond re set. Ugh. Welp. Time to pony up. 
 

diamonds are inflated market grabage. Much like air cooled porchses these days.  One makes my wife happy one I want. 

hybridmomentspass said:

It's now in my gunsafe until next week.

WOW

Reminds me of the old joke...

"I got a gun for my wife" - "good trade sir"

RX Reven' said:

hybridmomentspass said:

It's now in my gunsafe until next week.

WOW

Reminds me of the old joke...

"I got a gun for my wife" - "good trade sir"

When my wife turned 38 I told her I was going to trade her for two 19s.

Wonder why I'm divorced.

I've been successfully married for 29 years. But when I go back in Doc's DeLorean, I won't do it again. It's fine for some people, particularly those that want to raise children.  And I thought it was what a guy did when he reached adulthood. But...meh.

Choose wisely.

Don't settle for 'good enough'.

Jeez, guys, the man is going to pop the question to the woman he loves. Can we not be Debbie Downers about it?

Congrats!

The only thing I regret about getting married was involving myself in the wedding planning beyond "here is the guest list for my half".

I don't regret getting the rock I did for my wife whatsoever. 

In reply to Duke :

Some people like to E36 M3 on everything.
 

It was one of the few good decisions I made and I don't regret much of it, and what I do are things I should have done better. 

Married for nearly 15 years, no kids, no regrets. I don't see why children are required to make it work.

I can tell you that it's not okay to refer to an anniversary present as a "participation trophy".

Congratulations!  I'm happy for you and it's awesome how excited you are. So many folks I know treat marriage as a task to complete...just a thing to do. Well done. 

35 years this March for us and 6 children. Her original ring was from a pawn shop owned by a friend. She was over the moon. As awful as that sounds,  it literally cost me 75% of my savings. I was also living on 6/$1 off brand Mac and cheese. 

20 years later we picked out a stone together and had it cut/set. Enjoy the moment...it sounds like you already are. 

Coming up on 31 years for me and I don't regret it at all.  We've never had kids and while I sometimes regret that it has no bearing on my happy marriage.   Incidental the engagement ring that my wife wears was designed by me based on feedback from looking at rings together and made by a small jeweler in Barre Vermont.  It cost around $350.00 at the time.

Keith Tanner said:

Married for nearly 15 years, no kids, no regrets. I don't see why children are required to make it work.

They aren't. We didn't have any.

Marriage is really a business arrangement, packaged in a romantic, religious box.  If you look at the pros/cons of the business side it really is geared (today) more for women than men. We typically have far more to lose.

Historically, marriage really was mostly a business arrangement between families. It would include land and livestock, among other valuables.  If you've watched Downton Abbey that was near the end of the period of that type of marriage in anglo-saxon countries.

Marriage still has value for raising children as it should assure an additional cushion of stability. Unfortunately, divorce-on-a-whim and out of wedlock births have removed much of the effectiveness.

Thus ends the sociology lecture for today.

Im checking DC weather, looks like no rain Sat or Sun (were leaving Sunday though), and it's equally cold both day (mid 40s for the high...). So Saturday will be it.  Im anxious. 

Don't be anxious, you know what the answer's going to be and both of you are going to be overjoyed about it.

You should only ever ask if you are certain of the answer.  Therefore, nervousness is misplaced.

I know the answer...still doesnt affect my nerves